Daring Greatly

Daring Greatly is a 2012 self-help book written by Brené Brown. It is a New York Times bestseller[1] and covers topics of vulnerability and shame.

Daring Greatly
AuthorBrené Brown
Original titleDaring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead.
PublisherGotham Books
Publication date
2012
ISBN978-1592408412
WebsiteOfficial website

Overview

The title of the book is taken from the 1910 speech Citizenship in a Republic by Theodore Roosevelt, in which he stated, "who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly."[2] In the book, Brown equates vulnerability with being something hard to do and that we need to "dare greatly" in order to overcome that vulnerability.[3] The book describes feelings of shame and unworthiness and how people have a hard time admitting they are doing certain things. It also talks about owning and engaging in vulnerability and shame resilience.[4]

At the end of the introduction of the chapter, Brown writes that the book will explore these questions:[5]

  • "What drives our fear of being vulnerable?"
  • "How are we protecting ourselves from vulnerability?"
  • "What price are we paying when we shut down and disengage?"
  • "How do we own and engage with vulnerability so we can start transforming the way we live, love, lead, and parent?"

Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1: Scarcity: Looking Inside our Culture of "Never Enough"
  • In this chapter, Brown discusses how our larger culture perpetuates a scarcity culture, where nothing is ever enough. This then seeps into our individual social systems (families, classrooms, community, workplace, relationships) making it difficult to practice vulnerability and allowing ourselves to be seen. It also makes us difficult for us to engage in the world from a place of worthiness.
  • Brown specifically breaks down scarcity culture into three components: same, comparison, and disengagement.Shame as a part of scarcity culture refers to how individuals are managed by fear of ridicule and worth is tied to achievement, productivity and perfectionism.Comparison refers to a lack of appreciation of individuals gifts and contributions and the placement of a narrow, specific standard on a way we "should" be.Disengagement refers to individuals not listening to one another, and also not feeling heard themselves.
  • Brown ends off the chapter by discussing that the opposite of a scarcity mindset is wholeheartedness, which she defines as "facing uncertainty, exposure, and emotional risks knowing that I am enough."[5]

Chapter 2: Debunking Vulnerability Myths
  • In this chapter Brown lists four myths of vulnerability (listed below) and dissects why they are not true.
    • Myth #1: "Vulnerability is weakness."
    • Myth #2: "I don't do vulnerability."
    • Myth #3: "Vulnerability is letting it all hang out."
    • Myth #4: "We can go it all alone."

Chapter 3: Understanding and Combating Shame

In this chapter, Brown discusses key points about shame. (listed below)

  • Shame derives power from us because we do not talk about it. Brown discusses that if we shared our feelings of shame, it would lose its power.
  • She writes that often those who are scared of vulnerability are very good at shame. She writes, "If we want to be fully engaged, to be connected, we have to be vulnerable. In order to be vulnerable, we need to develop resistance to shame."[5]
  • Brown discusses that in order to be vulnerable and not experience shame, we need to not attach our self worth to the outcome of something. Then if it fails, we do not take it deeply because we have understood that we have aligned with our true self: a person who dares greatly.
  • "A sense of worthiness inspires us to be vulnerable, share openly, and preserve. Shame keeps us small, resentful, and afraid. In shame-prone cultures, where parents, leaders, and administrators consciously and unconsciously encourage people to connect their self-worth with what they produce, I see disengagement, blame, gossip, stagnation, favoritism, and a total dearth of creativity and innovation."[3]

Reception

A review from Kirkus praised the book, describing it as "[a] straightforward approach to revamping one's life from an expert on vulnerability".[6] A Publishers Weekly review also stated that the book's main message is "understanding the difference between guilt and shame".[5] The book was also commercially well-received, and was a New York Times bestseller.[1]

References
  1. "Love and Relationships- December 11, 2016". The New York Times. 11 December 2016. Retrieved 29 April 2022.
  2. Baer, Drake (17 September 2012). "Why Doing Awesome Work Means Making Yourself Vulnerable". Fast Company. Retrieved 2 May 2022.
  3. May, Kate Torgovnick (11 September 2012). "5 insights from Brené Brown's new book, Daring Greatly, out today". TED Blog. Retrieved 2 May 2022.
  4. Landro, Laura (29 October 2012). "Healthy Reader". The Wall Street Journal. Retrieved 2 May 2022.
  5. "Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown". www.publishersweekly.com. Retrieved 2022-09-10.
  6. DARING GREATLY | Kirkus Reviews.


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