How to Get Someone's Phone Number

You've got a crush, how exciting! But how exactly can you score their digits? From texting about your days to making plans for a date, having someone's phone number can be a game changer. This way, you two can keep building up your rapport, and you can do it all without being in the same place. Plus, getting your crush's phone number is probably easier than you'd think. We're walking you through all of the top tips below.

Method 1
Method 1 of 4:

Preparing to Ask

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    Build up your confidence. A person with confidence is very attractive to the opposite gender.[1]
    • Feel your best by putting on your favorite outfit, styling your hair, and listening to your favorite music. Of course, you can only do this if you know in advance that you plan on asking someone for their number.
    • Even if you don’t feel that confident, act with confidence. It will appear the same to onlookers, and eventually the act will transition to the real deal.
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    Don’t rehearse too much. If you practice a scene over and over in your head about asking for someone’s number, it will either 1) look equally rehearsed in person, or 2) work out differently in real life, making the practice unnecessary.
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    Know your intentions. Are you asking this persons number to call them up for fun? To meet them the next day? For a date in a week? Have an idea of what you plan on doing with their number before you ask.[2]
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    Be prepared for conversation. Although nerves can get in the way and make real talking seem like the most frightening thing in the world, it is unfortunately necessary for you to sell your charming self in exchange for a number.[3]
    • Don’t expect to just walk up, ask for a number, and leave. You will have to do a little talking before and after the number-taking goes down.
    • Be open and honest. They may ask you questions, in which case your best solution is to be brief and truthful.[4]
    • Don’t monopolize the conversation. Although it is easy to talk about ourselves, ask your potential partner questions and give them time to respond. Be a good listener, it is very attractive.
    • Know when to end the conversation. Although a little discussion is good, drawing it out for too long becomes boring. Make sure that you aren’t being too time-consuming in your conversations.[5]
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    Don’t stalk them. Although you may know in advance that you want a person’s phone number, never stalk them to get it. Being caught in the act of creeping on them will definitely not put you on their good side.[6] [7]
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Method 2
Method 2 of 4:

Asking for the Number

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    Try being direct. The most simple option is being very direct. Approach the person, start a conversation, and make a comment along the lines of “you know, I’ve really enjoyed talking to you. Do you think I could have your phone number and we could do it again sometime?”[8] [9]
    • If you are asking a stranger, don’t worry about having a lengthy conversation. The person likely knows that you are approaching them out of romantic interest.
    • If you know this person before asking for their number, make sure your intentions are clear. You don’t want to come across as a platonic friend looking for support when you are really romantically interested in them.
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    Ask to borrow something. Say that you need to borrow something, for example a pen, and then ask if you can have their phone number so you can call them to meet and give whatever the item was back to them. This is simultaneously flirty and straightforward, a perfect combination.
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    Ask with a choice. Instead of asking a yes-or-no “can I have your number?” question, offer two choices. “Could I have your phone number or email?” This way, they are more likely to give you a definite means of contacting them.
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    Swap business cards. Although business cards are less commonly held by today's youth, swapping business cards is a great way to get someone’s contact. It also verifies that their number is real, not a fake one given because they aren’t interested.[10]
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Method 3
Method 3 of 4:

What to Do Next

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    Walk away smoothly. Once you’ve gotten their phone number, don’t linger. Instead, walk away calmly and either leave the scene or hang out in a different area.
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    Wait patiently. Although you have their number now, don’t take that as a sign to call them immediately. Wait at least 24 hours before making a move and giving them a call.
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    Call, don’t text. Although texting offers an emotional shield, it is distancing and impersonal. For a much more personal conversation, call them. This goes for the first or the fortieth time you get a hold of them; calling is almost always preferable to texting.
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    Don’t panic. This is just another person, right? So don’t become anxious and worried the first time you actually use their number. Keep calm and collected and it will show, making you even that much more attractive to them.
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Method 4
Method 4 of 4:

Getting Someone's Phone Number Without Asking

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    Take their phone. If you are with the person, try taking their phone. Note that it's best to be open and flirty about it since you could get into trouble if you take their phone secretly or against their wishes.
    • Send yourself a text message from their phone, and add your contact to their list.
    • Look up their number in their phone settings.
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    Ask someone else for their number. If you have a mutual friend, simply ask them for the person's number instead. This way, you get the number without having to be so up-front about it.
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    Look it up in a directory. If you have a phone book, school directory, or archive of coworker phone numbers, look up their number. Use whatever method you have available to find their number.
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References

  1. ↑ https://www.datetricks.com/impress-a-girl/how-to-get-a-girls-phone-number/
  2. ↑ Patti Novak Williams. Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.
  3. ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.
  4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201712/10-must-know-tips-making-better-conversations
  5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201712/10-must-know-tips-making-better-conversations
  6. ↑ Patti Novak Williams. Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.
  7. ↑ http://www.cnn.com/2010/TECH/social.media/08/18/netiquette.ask.date/index.html
  8. ↑ Patti Novak Williams. Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.
  9. ↑ https://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/get-the-guy-you-want-to-give-you-his-phone-number
  1. ↑ http://www.itmightbelove.com/2008/03/30/how-to-ask-someone-for-their-phone-number/
  2. ↑ Patti Novak Williams. Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.
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