How to Accept a Marriage Proposal

Co-authored by Nicolette Tura, MA and Janice Tieperman

Last Updated: August 7, 2022

Few moments in life are as unforgettable as a marriage proposal. Even if you’re expecting your significant other to pop the question, the sheer excitement and anticipation can leave you drawing a blank when the moment actually arrives. Don’t worry. We’ve put together plenty of tips and tricks to help you stay clearheaded and focused when your partner does get down on 1 knee.

1

Plan ahead for the occasion.

Brainstorm what you’d like to say before your partner proposes. Set aside a special poem, or write out your feelings on a separate sheet of paper. When the big moment finally arrives, you’ll already have something planned to say.^{[1]
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- You can find lots of romantic poems here: https://www.poetryfoundation.org/collections/145134/love-poems.
- Planning ahead may seem a little silly, but it’s a great way to share your feelings when the time comes. During the actual proposal, you might be too shocked and emotional to share everything that’s really on your mind.
- You might say something like, “I’ve never felt so strongly about someone in my life” or “I thought you’d never ask!”
- If your partner starts talking about budgeting money, meets with your friends in secret, and/or comments on other people’s engagement rings, there’s a good chance they’re planning to propose.^{[2]
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2

Follow your partner’s plans.

Don’t pepper them with questions or concerns about where you’re going. Chances are, your significant other has put a lot of thought and care into where and when this proposal is going to happen. Instead of asking for an explanation, go with the flow and see where your partner takes you.^{[3]
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- For example, your partner might take you to the coffee shop where you first met instead of going to the shop that’s right around the corner.
- Your partner’s proposal plans will probably be specific and well-intentioned. If they’d like to bring you to a particular place, just follow their lead instead of asking a lot of questions.

3

Take a deep breath.

Let yourself focus on what’s happening in the moment. Proposals are rare, once-in-a-lifetime experiences. Take a deep breath to help ground yourself so you can listen and focus specifically on what your partner is saying.^{[4]
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4

Let them finish talking.

Give your answer after they’ve said their piece. Proposals are definitely a 2-way street. It’s great that you want to share your thoughts and feelings with your partner, but give them a chance to express themselves, too.^{[5]
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- Depending on how your partner proposes, you might wait until they officially ask “Will you marry me?” before you say “yes.”

5

Say “yes.”

Don’t leave your partner hanging! Let them know right away that you want to marry them. Try to match your partner’s tone and body language, so they know for sure that you’re saying yes.^{[6]
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- For example, if your partner looks especially nervous, you might just say “Yes!” or “Of course I’ll marry you!”
- You might also say something like “I can’t believe this is happening” or “I’m so happy” before you say “yes.”
- “Absolutely, 100% yes!” “Nothing would make me happier!” or “It would be my honor!” are other things you might say.

6

Enjoy the moment.

Don’t call your friends and family right away. Instead, give yourself and your partner plenty of time to savor and enjoy each other’s company and think about your future together. There will be plenty of time later to celebrate with your loved ones.^{[7]
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- For instance, you might wait a day or 2 before officially sharing your engagement with friends and family.
- Everyone reacts to a proposal in different ways. You could be really emotional, or you might just feel happy and relieved. There’s no right or wrong way to feel and behave after the fact!

7

Don’t worry if the ring isn’t perfect.

Ultimately, the ring is a symbol of something much bigger. If you aren’t crazy about the ring, it’s not the end of the world. When push comes to shove, you can always replace or update the ring further down the line—it’s the person who gave you the ring that really matters.^{[8]
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- If needed, you can always get the ring resized by a jeweler later on.

Community Q&A

Question

How will I know if he is getting ready to pop the question?

Community Answer

When he's talking about the future, be sure he says "we" and "us" instead of just "me" or "I".
Question

I know my partner is going to propose. How do I act surprised?

Community Answer

Just smile and put your hands on your cheeks like most people do. Then yell yes!
Question

Is it right to make love after being proposed to?

Community Answer

Yes, because romance and emotions are in the air. It must be consensual though.