How to Manifest Love

Co-authored by Jennifer McVey, Cht and Dan Hickey

Last Updated: March 3, 2023 References

Are you looking for the universe’s help in finding love? It might feel like a daunting task, but manifesting a real and fulfilling love is simpler than you think. There are a ton of easy things you can do to get clarity on what you want and position yourself to grab it once the opportunity appears. Read on for a comprehensive list of ways to signal the universe that you’re ready to be your best self and manifest the love you deserve.

1

Decide what kind of love you want.

Manifestation works the best when your desire is super specific. Are you looking for a new boyfriend or girlfriend? A fiery summer fling? A future spouse to start a family with? Be really honest with yourself and consider what you truly want. The more detailed and authentic your desire, the more likely it is to come your way.^{[1]
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- Focus on the “what” you want and not the “how” (that’s for the universe to decide).
- Write down what you want or create a vision board with images that represent your future relationship. Physically creating something puts your manifesting in motion.

2

Make a list of your ideal partner’s traits.

Jot down everything you can think of, no matter how small or silly. Again, specificity and honesty are essential to bringing your manifestation to life.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Jennifer McVey, Cht
Spiritual Director
Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.} What does your partner do for work? How’s their sense of humor? What are they passionate about? The clearer your perception of them, the easier it will be to find them.^{[3]
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- Handwrite your list with a pen and paper instead of typing it out.^{[4]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Jennifer McVey, Cht
  Spiritual Director
  Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.} The universe tends to reciprocate physical acts of doing or creating something.
- Keep your list somewhere private where you can return to it later. Your list isn’t set in stone and you can revise it as you gain clarity on your wants.
- We can’t predict who we fall in love with, so it’s OK if you don’t have a lot of physical or visual traits about your partner on your list. Focus on how they make you feel or what they add to your life.
- Always include the date when you're writing your manifestations down.^{[5]
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  Expert Source
  
  Jennifer McVey, Cht
  Spiritual Director
  Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.}

3

Visualize what life looks like with that person.

Let yourself dream and fantasize about life with your perfect partner. What activities do you do together? Where do you live? What do you like to talk about? Meditation is a great way to paint a clearer picture for yourself: close your eyes, focus on your ideal romantic future, and let yourself feel what your perfect love feels like.^{[6]
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- Try writing down a few notes about your perfect love on a piece of paper. Read it over a few times before bed and keep it under your pillow while you sleep.^{[7]
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- If you created a mood or vision board, spend a few minutes each day looking at it and meditating on your intent.

4

Write a letter to your future self.

Imagine where you’ll be a few months to a year from now. It’s unlikely you’ll have found your soulmate or had your dream wedding in such a short time, but maybe you’ve gone on more dates than normal or gotten more confident talking to new people. Congratulate yourself on the attainable progress you’ve made towards your goal as if it’s already happened.^{[8]
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- A letter to your future self is a powerful way to heighten your self-awareness and let the universe know you’re serious about finding love.
- When you’ve finished your letter, spend time reflecting on your life now. Are you on track to meet these goals by the time you open your letter? What can you do to get there?

5

Act like you’ve already found love.

How do you feel when you’re with your dream partner? Chances are you’re not obsessing over finding someone or doubting your ability to be loved. Let go of your insecurities over being single. Amp up your self-care routine, explore your hobbies and interests, and do things that make you feel authentic and empowered.^{[9]
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Research source} Try things like:
- Introducing yourself to new people with confidence
- Buying and wearing things because you like them, not because you want to be noticed in them
- Feeling secure with a night in on the weekends

6

Change old habits that are holding you back.

Manifestation is a chance to get “unstuck” and break negative cycles. You won’t manifest something new if you keep doing the same old ineffective routines. Make changes in your life to show the universe you’re ready to co-create a new life and remember that you have the power to get what you want.^{[10]
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Research source} Some old habits to change might be:
- Agreeing to go on dates with people very unlike your dream partner (saying “yes” to the wrong people only shows the universe that that’s what you want)
- Ruminating on your flaws with negative self-talk
- Using alcohol or drugs to help you talk to people

7

Take steps every day toward your goal.

Make a plan of specific things you can do to help your love manifest. These can be very small at first, like downloading a new dating app or practicing flirty eye contact. Eventually you might aim to go on 2 dates per week or communicate your feelings more openly. Keep your end goal in mind and only take actions that will bring you closer to your dream partner.^{[11]
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Research source} Try:
- Editing your bio or changing your photos on a dating app
- Practicing making friendly small talk with different kinds of people
- Taking a new route to work or going to different bars and coffee shops to run into new people

8

Practice gratitude every day.

The universe rewards people who stay grateful and humble. Acknowledge all the positive things happening for you, no matter how small. Thank the universe for sending you your true love, even if you haven’t met them yet. Gratitude keeps you operating at a high vibration—AKA, projecting good vibes.^{[12]
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Research source} Practice gratitude by:
- Writing in a gratitude journal every night about the good things that happened to you that day or moved you closer to your dream partner
- Saying 3 things you’re grateful for before you go to bed each night
- Meditating on what you’re grateful for for a few minutes each day

9

Believe you deserve the love you want.

Let go of negative experiences that taught you you don’t deserve love. If you don’t believe it, the universe won’t manifest it. When you work through the emotional damage or trauma that holds you back, you’re able to love as your whole self with a blank slate. Remember you can achieve anything if you believe in yourself!^{[13]
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- Counter negative thoughts (“I’m too old,” “I’m not successful enough”) with positive affirmations (“I deserve love my whole life,” “I’m satisfied with what I’ve accomplished”).
- Consider therapy or counseling for help dissecting past trauma that’s impeding on your goals and to learn new coping skills.
- Let go of people who have hurt or disappointed you in the past. Stay optimistic about the new, wonderful people waiting to enter your life.
- The key to manifestation is being aware that you are a powerful creator spirit who is able to create your own life.^{[14]
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  Expert Source
  
  Jennifer McVey, Cht
  Spiritual Director
  Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.}

10

Surround yourself with love.

Love in all forms attracts more love. Practice gratitude for your personal relationships and surround yourself with the platonic love of your friends and the familial love of your family. Appreciate the love you have for yourself too—when you become a source of love, you will attract someone ready to receive and reciprocate it.^{[15]
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- Practice self-love with daily affirmations of love and gratitude for yourself, your characteristics, and your attributes.

11

Look for subtle signs that it’s working.

Finding love probably won’t unfold the exact way you imagined it would. Some signs, like way more matches than normal on a dating app, are pretty clear.^{[16]
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Expert Source

Jennifer McVey, Cht
Spiritual Director
Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.} Other things, like knowing if the cute barista that smiled at you is your soulmate, are murkier.^{[17]
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Research source} Look for things like:
- Any mention of your desires in print or pictures you come across
- Overhearing someone talk about goals similar to yours
- Feeling unexplained sparks of joy or excitement
- As you get better at manifesting, you may notice it happening faster and faster.^{[18]
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  Expert Source
  
  Jennifer McVey, Cht
  Spiritual Director
  Expert Interview. 21 December 2021.}

12

Reassess your manifest practice.

Check in with your original goals, lists, and visions from time to time. As you grow as a person, you might discover you need or want something different than what you originally thought. That’s OK! Update your actions and practices to best suit your intentions.^{[19]
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- Examine what you’ve accomplished and what you still need to do. What changes can you make to get there?
- If your manifestation isn’t working, revisit the original type of love or partner traits you envisioned. Did you leave something out? Were you dishonest with yourself or including things that other people expect for you? Are there any fears holding you back?

Expert Q&A

Question

Why is my manifestion not working?

Jennifer McVey, Cht
Spiritual Director
Jennifer McVey is a Spiritualist, Seer, and the Spiritual Director of Spiritual Answers and Solutions. With more than 22 years of experience, she specializes in manifesting, ghosts and spirit attachments, hypnotherapy, channeling, and spiritually based life coaching. Jennifer has also published 13 Affirmation Image and six Word Search Puzzle books in spirituality and self-help and has produced over 600 audio sessions.

Jennifer McVey, Cht

Spiritual Director

Expert Answer

You might not have found the best way to match the correct vibration! Don't worry—it doesn't mean that you have bad karma or that you're unworthy of what you're trying to manifest.