Caregivers need help too 317
Caregivers need help too
Understand your feelings
If I knew more about Li
Caregivers stay busy trying to make things
better for the person with the disability.
They often focus on how that person is
feeling. But, if you are a caregiver, it is also
Peng’s disability, I could help
better. Neither of us knows
what she needs. It makes
me feel very frustrated and
sometimes I don’t feel like
important to take time to notice your own
helping her.
feelings. Even if you are glad to assist a woman with a
disability, you will sometimes get tired, experience stress, or
feel frustrated or upset. As a caregiver, you may work in many different ways—as a nurse,
a counselor, a driver, a cook, an accountant, and a housekeeper—all at the same time. If
you look after a person who is very ill or depressed, you may experience more stress.
It is natural for family members and others who assist women with disabilities to feel
ashamed or guilty for being frustrated, tired, angry, or upset. Even a person who cares for a
close relative or a spouse can experience uncomfortable feelings and strong emotions.
Do not feel guilty or ashamed for wanting to get away sometimes.
If you can notice and think about what makes you feel angry, frustrated, or helpless,
then you can try to find a way to change the underlying causes of your feelings.
A sudden disability affects the whole family
I’m scared,
daddy. Is Ma
going to be
OK?
She will be OK, Abe,
but it will take a long
time. The land mine
she stepped on did a
lot of damage, so she
will need a lot of help
from us until she feels
better.
When someone close to you becomes disabled suddenly, because of an
accident or an illness, everyone gets injured in a way. The unexpected change
in your life can be frightening, and can cause you and other family members
to feel very sad or angry.
A Health Handbook for Women with Disabilities 2007