How to Make Time for Yourself

Co-authored by Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA

Last Updated: March 5, 2023 References

When you have a busy schedule, no matter if you're an adult or a teen, you should be able to relax once in a while. This can seem hard with demands of work, school, and family life. But it's also important to your overall well-being. No matter how busy you are, it's important to take time from your schedule to focus on yourself.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Finding Time in Your Schedule for You

1
Make time where you can. It can seem like everything is important, especially when it comes to work and tasks around the house. Delegate some of your responsibility, or cut out what isn't absolutely necessary to your day to clear your schedule.
- Ask for help from your family. This can be asking a child to do chores or your spouse to run to the grocery store. Delegating tasks like this can free up twenty minutes to spend on yourself.
- Find jobs to outsource. This may hurt your budget a little, but find a service to mow your lawn or a cleaning service to help around the house.
- Learn to say no. Don't keep taking on endless tasks. Understand that you have a limit and learn to say no to things without feeling guilty.
- If you're bogged down at work, find help. This can be someone under you at work, a co-worker, or even asking a boss to help lessen your load.
2
Accept not doing things perfectly. Often people are bogged down the need to get every task just right. This can mean you stay after work, answer work e-mails on the weekend, or simply can't go to sleep until all of the dishes are done. Accept that you can't get everything done. At a certain point every night, put everything down and focus on doing something you want.
- Realize that most things can wait and you'll have another opportunity to do tasks. Also, taking time away from important tasks can actually improve your performance.
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3
Schedule in your free time. We are so good at scheduling in tasks for everyone else, it's important to do this for yourself. Put in a slot each day, or at least a few times a week, that are as solid as a work or family commitment. Block off an hour in the evening that you can't break unless its an emergency.^{[1]
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- This doesn't need to be time alone, just time spent doing things you enjoy. This can be watching a movie with a friend, or even going out to dinner. Making time for yourself can come in many forms.
4
Learn what you're making time for. Finding specific activities that you're looking forward to. This will not only give you a more clear picture of what you want to do, but a concrete goal of why you're making time for yourself to start with.^{[2]
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- Find things you enjoy but don't typically do. This can be read a book, exercise, or even watch T.V. Find things that you truly enjoy and you are more likely to take time from your schedule to really do them.
- If you're feeling stuck, try thinking of things you enjoyed when you were younger, like a hobby you used to really love. You might just feel inspired to give it another shot!^{[3]
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  Expert Source
  
  Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA
  Life Coach
  Expert Interview. 22 April 2020.}
5
Change up your routine. It may not always be possible to squeeze in time during the day for yourself but you can make a point to make time before or after work. Instead of getting up at 6:30 to rush off for work, get up a half hour earlier. Spend this time doing something you like before your day starts. You might be a little more tired throughout the day, but this is a great way to jumpstart the work day!^{[4]
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- Do this even if it's for a short time. Spending 5-10 minutes charging up for the day can be a great exercise to keep at.
6
Put down the electronics. It's easy to be sucked into a social media app or television show for hours. You may enjoy these activities but they can also consume all of your free time, many times without even seeming like it. For an hour each day, put down your phone, computer, and even your T.V. Get the most of your time by experiencing it radically present, not mindlessly wrapped up in an app.
- Spend some time being alone. Get your spouse to go out with their friends. You could also tell them to stay home with you, since there are no kids running around. If you're a teen, just shut your door or go to the bathroom and lock the door.

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Filling Your Time

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Get exercising. This is a great way to relieve stress and get healthy at the same time. Physical exercise is important for both your mental and physical health. When you do this regularly it will become part of a routine and something that you consistently make time for.^{[5]
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- If you hate the gym or jogging, get outside to be active. This is a great way to disconnect from the stresses of home and work to immerse yourself in nature.
2
Start doing things you've put off. Don't get on facebook, but decorate pictures. Do something that you kept promising yourself or others that you would do. This can be a craft project, or reorganizing your kitchen. Make sure it's something that you look forward to and will enjoy because you'll be more likely to keep making time for it.^{[6]
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- Do one of your hobbies you have trouble finding time for. Draw, sew, knit, make jewelry, just do something that you like to do.
3
Find time for friends and family. Part of finding time for yourself is reminding yourself that your job is not everything. This does not necessarily mean you have to spend your time alone. In order to be a successful person you must prioritize your relationships with friends and family as well as your work. They can also help keep you accountable. When they seek to spend time with you, don't reject them because you are busy, but make time for it. You'll be better off.
4
Find time to be alone. Take a long, hot bath or sit in a room and think. Sort things out. A time like this can really help you notice somethings and it's good for you to address your problems or go back to the good times.Turn off the TV and leave your smart phone in the other room and just be alone with your thoughts.
- Cook or order one of your favorite meals. Eat what you like and be yourself. Sometimes during the rush of a work day we might find ourselves grabbing food on the go and eating it in a rush. Make time for yourself to cook something you enjoy and a slow sit-down mean to savor it.
- Don't be afraid to ask for time to yourself once in awhile. Taking care of yourself physically and mentally is important, and it's a lot harder to do that if you're constantly giving your energy to other people.^{[7]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA
  Life Coach
  Expert Interview. 22 April 2020.}

Expert Q&A

Question

Is it OK to take time for yourself?

Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA
Life Coach
Michelle Shahbazyan is the Founder of The LA Life Coach, a concierge life, family, and career coaching service based in Los Angeles, California. She has over 10 years of experience with life coaching, consulting, motivational speaking, and matchmaking. She has a BA in Applied Psychology and an MS in Building Construction and Technology Management from Georgia Tech University, and a MA in Psychology with an emphasis on Marriage and Family Therapy from Phillips Graduate University.

Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA

Life Coach

Expert Answer

Yes! In fact, try looking at the habits of successful people you look up to. Their day-to-day routines might give you some insight into how you can be more productive, so you'll have more time for yourself.
Question

How can I make more time for myself if I'm usually a people-pleaser?

Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA
Life Coach
Michelle Shahbazyan is the Founder of The LA Life Coach, a concierge life, family, and career coaching service based in Los Angeles, California. She has over 10 years of experience with life coaching, consulting, motivational speaking, and matchmaking. She has a BA in Applied Psychology and an MS in Building Construction and Technology Management from Georgia Tech University, and a MA in Psychology with an emphasis on Marriage and Family Therapy from Phillips Graduate University.

Michelle Shahbazyan, MS, MA

Life Coach

Expert Answer

People-pleasing is one of the biggest causes of stress for people, because it's not actually possible to please everybody, and you'll usually find that you're not giving yourself everything you need. When you're better at taking care of yourself, you'll find that you'll be more productive, and you'll have more time and energy.
Question

How do I make time for myself to both read and study my spelling words? I have lots of other things to do.

Anxious ball of fire

Community Answer

Write down a schedule. For example, you can read for half an hour, practice your spelling words for an hour, then continue reading for another half an hour. Don't be afraid to take breaks while studying.

Warnings

Don't forget that this little break only lasts a few hours and you're going to have to go back to real life soon.

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Don't make too much of a mess because you are the one who has to clean it.

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