12+ Signs He Loves You Without Saying It

Co-authored by Jan & Jillian Yuhas and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: November 11, 2021 References

When you’re in a new relationship, being the first one to say “I love you” can feel really nerve wracking. Not everyone is super vocal about their feelings, so getting a read on whether or not your partner loves you can be difficult. That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most common signs that he loves you, even if he hasn’t quite said those 3 little words yet.

1

He makes time to hang out with you.

It shows that he appreciates you and your company. If your boyfriend makes the time to see you often or rearranges his schedule for you, it might be because he has super strong feelings for you.^{[1]
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Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.} Even if he’s busy with work or school, he’ll make it a point to hang out with you.^{[2]
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2

He pays attention when you talk.

This shows that he really wants to hear what you have to say. If you two start talking, he’ll put down his phone or close his laptop to pay attention.^{[3]
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Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.} He’s showing you that you’re an important part of his life, and he wants to hear what you have to say.^{[4]
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- Does he make eye contact, lean in closer, and nod as you're talking to him? He's showing you that he's listening.
- We all get distracted by our phones from time to time, so don’t be too worried if he gets stuck looking at a screen every once in a while. If he makes it a point to listen to you the majority of the time, then he may have strong feelings for you.

3

He makes future plans with you in mind.

These could be vacations, living situations, or career moves. When he includes you in his plans for the future, it means that he sees this relationship lasting long-term.^{[5]
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Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.} This is a great sign, because it shows that he loves and cares about you a lot.^{[6]
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- For instance, when he thinks about which city he wants to live in, he might also ask if you’d be able to get a job in that area.
- Or, if he’s planning a vacation, he might invite you along and see which dates are good for you.

4

He misses you when you’re apart.

When you two aren’t together, does he call or text you? Even if you’ve only been apart for a few days (or even a few hours), someone who loves you won’t be able to stay away for long. If you hear from him pretty consistently when you two can’t hang out, it can mean that he is falling for you.^{[7]
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- We all get busy with work, school, or responsibilities sometimes, so don’t be too worried if he doesn’t reach out a lot when you two aren’t together.

5

He goes out of his way to do favors for you.

Maybe he offers to pick you up from work when your car is in the shop. Or, maybe he brings you your favorite soup when you’re sick. Little things like this don’t seem like much in the moment, but when someone does them for you, it means they really care about you.^{[8]
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- He might even do things for you that inconvenience him, like driving a few hours to see you or heading out of his way to pick you up and drop you off.

6

He remembers small things about you.

Things like your favorite food or your favorite color will be locked in his mind. Even if you said it off-hand (or you can’t even remember mentioning it), if he loves you, he’ll remember it for a long time. If he shows up unexpectedly with your favorite flowers in-hand, you’ll know he’s the guy for you.^{[9]
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- He might also memorize parts of your earlier conversations and remember them later.

7

He buys you little gifts.

Small things, like candy or flowers, mean a lot from a guy. If he shows up a lot with little gifts that he picked up for you, it means he was thinking about you, even when you’re not around. And remember: gifts can be free things, too!^{[10]
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- Maybe he saw a beautiful pebble on the beach and grabbed it for you, or he picked you some pretty flowers out of his neighbor’s garden.

8

He leaves you sweet notes.

Guys sometimes have a hard time expressing their feelings out loud. He might counter this by writing down what he feels and leaving his notes around your home after he leaves. Even if he’s not a poet, his loving notes will make you feel great, and you’ll know that he really cares about you.^{[11]
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9

He holds your hand in public.

Who doesn’t love a sweet show of affection in public? If he grabs your hand as you walk down the street or even when you’re with his friends, it means he wants to show the world that you’re together. He might even bring you in for a quick kiss or a hug while you’re out and about, which is a great way to show you that he cares.^{[12]
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- Some guys aren’t super comfortable with PDA, so if he’s not doing this, he might just be a little shy about it.

10

He introduces you to his friends and family.

It means he wants to involve you in his life. If you’ve gotten the chance to hang out with his family or meet up with his friends, he could have intense feelings for you.^{[13]
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Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.} It’s a doubly good sign if they all like you, too!^{[14]
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- On the flip side, some people like to wait a while before introducing their partners to their families. If he’s been dragging his feet on this, he might just be waiting until he’s sure the relationship is serious.

11

He supports your goals.

When you try something new, he constantly hypes you up. If you’re working hard for a promotion, he’ll bring you a cup of coffee when you’re working late. If you’re trying a new art project, he’ll help you shop for supplies. He’ll encourage and support you no matter what, because he cares about you.^{[15]
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- And, if things don’t work out, he’ll encourage you to keep working hard and find something else.

12

He gets you through tough times.

Is he the first person you go to on a bad day? Maybe he lends you a shoulder to cry on when you’re going through a really tough time. Partners support each other like this because they love and care about each other, so it’s a great sign if you feel like you can lean on him when times get tough.^{[16]
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- He might even support you in other ways, like bringing you meals when you aren’t feeling up to cooking or bringing you something special to cheer you up.^{[17]
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  Jan & Jillian Yuhas
  Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
  Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.}

13

He defends you and your relationship.

If there’s any criticism, he’s ready and willing to step up to the plate. Sometimes, well-meaning friends and family will have things to say about your relationship, even if it’s not accurate. If that happens and he truly loves you, he won’t let anyone talk badly about you. Listen in on how he defends your relationship to others to get a read on how he really feels.^{[18]
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- Standing together against outside forces really strengthens your bond, and it can set you up for a loving, healthy relationship.