How to Date a Cancer

Co-authored by Stina Garbis

Last Updated: October 23, 2022 Approved

If a Cancer is on your radar, buckle up. You're in for an interesting ride. The most loyal and caring of all the signs, Cancer is also a bundle of dynamism and complexity. Those born between June 22 and July 22 are quite the companions. Are you up to the challenge?

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Breaking The Ice

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If you want to sweep someone off their feet, know that this is the sign for you. Cancer women are the definition of the woman waiting for her knight in shining armor. She loves romance, intimacy, and being openly cared for. Cancer men will be romantic and courtly, lavishing you with gifts and coy praise. Though they move slowly, romance is in their hearts.
- Cancer needs to be shown that you are the real deal. In order to get the ball rolling, you'll need to give it a push first. So grab your white horse and get to trotting. Cancer, in all its dynamic glory, is worth it.
2
Get to know them. Because Cancer is such a cautious sign, it will serve your relationship best to get to know them before you demand any higher level of romance or intimacy. Becoming friends first will allow them to slowly fall for you.
- Cancer is a very physically affectionate sign. Complement your relationship with small touches, hugs, and subtle -- yet significant -- displays of affection. Warm them up to your touch. They'll love to reciprocate.^{[1]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Stina Garbis
  Psychic Astrologer
  Expert Interview. 14 February 2022.}
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3
Go for it. If you're a girl, you might need to make the first move instead of waiting for him to do it. If you're a guy, be aware that she might have to take more time than normal before she is ready to kiss you. This doesn't mean they're not into you, it just means they need to be drawn out of their shell!
- Never ask them out in public, as this will make them feel nervous. Ask them out in private. Invite them on a casual, yet fun, date. Nothing with too much pressure or too many stigmas.
  - Just because someone is a Cancer doesn't mean they can't have fun. Try taking them to the beach or swimming pool, since this is a water sign.
4
Don't bother with games. Cancers are super intuitive when it comes to people and their motivations, so don't waste your time playing hard to get, cat and mouse, or any other variety of mind game. They'll see right through you and know you're not being genuine.
- Cancers, if they feel comfortable, will be direct with you. They need you to be direct with them, too! If you're presenting an image around them or trying to be mysterious, they will not be having it. They're super good at reading people, so don't even think about hiding your emotions!
5
Make them feel at home. Cancers are huge on family and feeling at home. Generally, they prefer staying at their home, but if you can make them feel comfortable anywhere, you're in. Let them know they are a part of your home and have free reign over the territory, too.
- Talk to them about your family. Let him or her know that you value yours and are a family man/woman. They'll take solace in knowing that you two are of like minds. Family is very important to them and nothing will ever change that.

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Knowing What to Expect

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Accept that your Cancer is old-fashioned, traditional, and loyal. These aren't bad things! In fact, they can be quite positive. When you nab a Cancer, they will be loyal to you to the moon and back. They expect you to be the definition of romance: loving, kind, maybe a bit conservative, and just as loyal as they are. Nothing wrong with that!
- When it comes to getting them in bed, they may be a bit vanilla. More romantic and sensual than spicy and exotic. But if you get them to trust you, they will be willing to open up their world. As long as you show them it's safe!
2
Know that they may have trust issues. Though trust issues are really a human thing, Cancers usually come with them right outta the gate. They want to trust others, they just find it hard. Especially with their great memories and their ability to hold grudges because of it. However, they love to love others, so it's very much so a give and take.
- This is probably Cancer's main drawback. It can be hard to crack their shell. But if you're willing to put in the work, it can be totally worth it. You'll find a soft, sensitive core that will put you above everyone and everything else.
3
Realize that Cancer needs to be needed. If this sign were given one label, it would be "nurturer." This is their default -- the only way they know how to operate. So be willing to lean on them! They love it. They thrive on it. Be open with your needs and they'll seek to fulfill them.^{[2]
X
Expert Source

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Expert Interview. 14 February 2022.} It makes them happy!
- Let them take care of you when you're sick. Talk to them about a problem when one pops up. Ask them their advice for an issue at work or with your friends. Heck, let them cook you dinner! Pretty good trade, huh?
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Get ready to be supremely cared for. Cancers are the most nurturing of all the signs.^{[3]
X
Expert Source

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Expert Interview. 14 February 2022.} If you want a relationship that's more of the anxious and avoidant type, Cancer is not for you. They will love showing you romance and affection. Hopefully you can reciprocate!
- This isn't to say that they're clingy. While they can be, it's so genuine it's hard to hold it against them. They just want to be around you and show you how much they care. It's almost admirable. If only everyone loved like a Cancer can!

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Solidifying the Relationship

1
Always be reassuring. Don't play hard to get -- Cancer will probably think you're not interested and don't care about them. If they seem to be feeling a bit insecure about themselves or the relationship, don't hesitate to comfort them. They'd do the same for you!
- They will not tolerate a temper on your behalf. If you get angry or upset at the little things, they'll think you're not being rational and seeing the big picture. If you get too angry at them, they'll think you don't care. They can be quite sensitive when they feel vulnerable.
2
Mean what you say. Cancers put a lot of weight in words. If you offer them a declaration of love, they'll take it as a declaration of love. So mean what you say. If you want to get a Cancer in bed, don't tell them you love them. Don't sugarcoat. It won't get you anywhere!
- If you don't mean what you say, they'll probably see through it anyway and deem you a liar. While you may not view it as lying, they will. So choose your words wisely. Cancer will remember what you say!
3
Be direct. Cancer may not be open with you initially, but once you get under the shell, they'll expose their inner selves to you and expect honesty that rivals their own. So be direct! Let them know how you feel. You'd appreciate the same behavior back, wouldn't you?
4
Sort through their bundle of complexities. Cancer is the crab. They have a hard exterior that's very difficult to crack through, but underneath is a person that's sensitive and emotional. They can at times come off very weak, but also be strong and independent. In short, they're a very dynamic, unpredictable sign. Can you keep up?
- They are very complex and can be quite fragile. Upset a Cancer and they'll be upset for days. When they feel safe and loved they are incredibly successful, wonderful human beings. When they feel vulnerable, they shut down and clam up. It's up to you to draw out the greatness inside them.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do you get cancer's attention?

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary.

Stina Garbis

Psychic Astrologer

Expert Answer

Remind them of their mother and let them take care of you! Go to them and ask for help if you are sick or injured — or just ask for help in general, as they love to emotionally support others.