How to Get Any Boy to Fall in Love With You

Co-authored by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

Last Updated: October 11, 2022 References

There's no way to guarantee that every boy in the world will fall in love with you, but there's a few things to get almost any boy to fall in love with you. The key is to be your best self and love yourself inside-out.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.} This wikiHow article will give you some guidance on how to catch a boy's interest and keep him hooked while still remaining true to yourself.

Part 1

Part 1 of 4:

Being Your Best Self

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Love how you look. If you want a boy to fall in love with you, he has to grow to love all of you, inside and out, but the outside is a great place to start. If you love the way that you look and are proud of your appearance, then the boy will be able to tell and will start to love how you look, too. If you are not happy with your appearance, you may need to spend some time working on loving yourself before you try to attract a boy.
- Wear clothes that make you feel pretty and comfortable. If you feel uncomfortable or self-conscious in tight clothes, then it'll show. If you see a sweatshirt that is on sale and you think he will notice it, go ahead and buy it if you can!
- Don't cake on the makeup! Your true love won't admire that if you do that. He'll want your natural beauty.
- Take care of yourself. Doing things like working out, eating well, getting your hair and nails done, and taking time to put on scented lotion will increase a man’s attraction for you and make you feel better about yourself as well.^{[2]
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Have a positive energy. Any boy will be much more likely to fall in love with you if you love what you do and feel more positive about the things in your life.^{[3]
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Expert Source

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.} If you make it known that you're happy pursuing your interests, schoolwork, or career, then he'll be more inclined to want to get to know you.^{[4]
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- If you're in school, don't complain about your classes and teachers. Instead, focus on the things you do love and why they make you happy.
- Love your extra-curricular activities and interests. Don't complain about soccer practice; instead, talk about how excited you are for Friday's game. Who wants to be around a person who doesn't like anything she's doing by choice?
- Stay positive. Whenever you talk about what you're doing that weekend or what your day looked like, say five positive things for every one negative thing. It's okay to complain once in a while, but complaining all of the time is a turn off.
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Love who you are. Getting someone to love you if you don’t love yourself may be impossible. If you want a boy to fall in love with you, then you have to love who you are and be proud of the person you're becoming.^{[5]
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Expert Source

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.} To love yourself, try some of the following techniques:^{[6]
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- Understand your strengths. Think of the top five things that make you remarkable -- write them down, if you have to. Then, use them to your advantage. Make the most of your good attributes by showing them off as much as possible. For example, if you know you have an amazing sense of humor, then flaunt it in front of your boy.
- Address your flaws. Loving who you are doesn't mean thinking you're flawless -- in fact, if you're aware of at least three qualities you need to work on, then you'll only love yourself more as you try to improve your problem areas.
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Develop confidence. As you work on loving how you look, loving what you do, and loving who you are, your confidence will skyrocket. If you're confident and comfortable with yourself, your boy will feel more confident about you as well.^{[7]
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Research source} To project your confidence, learn to speak clearly, stand up for yourself, and be comfortable enough with yourself to laugh at yourself now and then.
- Remember that there's a difference between being confident and being arrogant. If you end up bragging about how great you are all the time, then that will be a turn off as well.

Part 2

Part 2 of 4:

Getting His Attention

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Be fun. If you want a boy to love you, then you have to look like a fun person to be around. Whenever he sees you, you should have a big smile on your face, do something silly, and be giggling or laughing with a group of friends. If you're a fun person, you'll become magnetic, and more people will want to hang around you because it'll be a guaranteed good time.^{[8]
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- Be adventurous. Fun people are okay with going out of their comfort zones to have a good time. Are you afraid of riding a unicycle, learning to do the foxtrot, or going hiking? Well, transfer your fear into positive energy, and you'll get more out of life.
- Don't be afraid to be goofy or just plain silly. You don't have to be an aloof model type to get a guy to fall in love with you. Show that you don't take yourself too seriously by wearing silly t-shirts, dressing up for theme parties, and even telling jokes that make people groan.
- Just look like you're having a good time. Be the person that everyone at the party gravitates toward by being animated, gesturing, and being excited whenever an old friend walks through the door. If you look like the most fun person in the room, your boy will notice you for sure.
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Work your body. Your body language can be essential in grabbing your guy's attention. Your body can get your guy interested before you even say a word, so it's important to get it right and not send him the wrong message from across the room. Here's how you can get a guy's attention with a few subtle moves:
- Don't be afraid to make eye contact. Lock eyes with the boy, let him know you see him, and then smile and look away. Don't stare -- just make eye contact for long enough to get the guy's attention. You can also try raising your eyebrows at him for a quick second to get his attention.^{[9]
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- Don't cross your arms over your chest. Keep them at your sides or use them to gesture. This will make you look open and approachable.
- Stand tall. Good posture will show that you're confident, and that you're comfortable with being who you are.
- Tilt your head. Tilting your head shows interest in a conversation and let’s him know you are engaged and listening^{[10]
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Be cute. Don’t be afraid to blush. Blushing is caused by blood rushing to the cheeks which makes them a pink or red color. This is attractive because it mimics the body’s response to sexual activity, and is believed to be an evolutionary adaptation to attract the opposite sex. You can try creating this effect with some pink blush and red lipstick. Go easy with the make up so you don’t end up looking garish^{[11]
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Flirt with him. If you want the guy to start falling in love with you, you have to show that you're interested by flirting a bit. You don't have to come on too strong to be able to keep up light banter with the guy, tease him a bit, and just be playful when you talk to the boy.
- Keep up a light banter. If he says something quick and funny, don't just laugh -- fire back an equally cute and funny comment. Then you can laugh to show him how much you're enjoying the conversation.
- Tease him. If you and the guy are comfortable enough with each other, then you can gently tease him for one of his interests -- like his obsession with his dog or guitar -- or even lightly poke fun at something he's wearing while obviously letting him know he looks good.
- If you really want to flirt, touch him lightly on the shoulder from time to time to get closer to him. Many guys find soft touches attractive.^{[12]
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Let him see what makes you special. If a boy falls in love with you, then he has to think that you're completely special in some way. Otherwise, why should he love you and not someone else? Let him know what makes you a unique person who is worth loving.^{[13]
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- Be yourself. Let him see who you really are, even if you think you're a bit nerdy, a bit shy, or just afraid to really open up to any boy. He can't love you if he doesn't really know you.^{[14]
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  Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
  Psychotherapist
  Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.}
- Open up. Let him know a bit more about your dreams or your fears. You should only do this once you get to know him better. If you've always wanted to be a pastry chef or event planner, let him know.
- Talk about your interests. Let him know what makes you want to get up in the morning -- whether it's learning French, volunteering at the local homeless shelter, or just spending time with your best friends.

Part 3

Part 3 of 4:

Keeping Him Hooked

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See other guys if you are not exclusive yet. One way to get a guy hooked on you is to demonstrate that other guys find you attractive too. This does not mean that you should flirt with other guys in front of him or try to make him jealous, but keep seeing other guys if he has not committed to you yet.^{[15]
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- If he complains about you dating other guys, just let him know that you would be happy to just see him if he wants to be in an exclusive relationship with you. But don't stop seeing other guys until it is clear that he is also going to stop seeing other girls.
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Take an interest in him. If you want him to stay in love with you, then you can't just let him worship you. You have to show that you care about who he is as a person too. After all, you want to be in love too, right? Here's how to show that you really care about him as a person:
- As you get to know each other, ask him questions about his personal life. Talk to him about his childhood, his family, and his background.
- Take an interest in his work or studies. If he's really into science or history, talk to him about those subjects instead of brushing him off.
- Ask his opinion. Ask what he thinks about different subjects, from your newest outfit to world affairs. Show that his perspective really matters to you.
- Understand his moods. Learn to be extra supportive if he's having a bad day.
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Compliment him.^{[16]
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Expert Source

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.} You don't have to smother him with praise to let him know that he's truly special, but you should give him a sincere compliment now and then. You can compliment him in person, through texting, or by leaving a note at his desk or his locker. This will let him know that you're thinking about how great he is.
- Try complimenting him for something he excels at. For example, you might say something like, "Dinner was delicious! You are such a good cook!" Or, "I really enjoyed your show last night. You are such a talented musician!"^{[17]
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- Only compliment him when you really mean it. Don't give him false praise just because you think it'll make him like you more.
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Be fascinating. If you want to keep the guy hooked, then you should not only let him know how unique he is to you, but make him love picking your brain and talking to you about almost any subject. If he's only attracted to you physically or just thinks you're a fun girl, he won't stay in love with you forever.
- Try playing board games together. The mental challenge and competition of games like Scrabble or chess will peak his interest in you.^{[18]
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- Be up to date on current events. A lot of boys love watching sports and keeping up on politics, so you should try doing these things too so you can keep up your end of the conversation.
- Read more in general. Reading more will expand your mind and will give you more to talk about in general.
- Don't ever be bored. Only boring people are truly bored. Be excited about your life and the world around you, and he'll only want to spend more time with you.

Part 4

Part 4 of 4:

Staying in Love

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Maintain your independence. Though you may think that the boy will only stay in love with you if he sees you every second of every day, the opposite is actually true. Your boy will be much more likely to stay in love with you if he sees that you have a life of your own, that you have some of your own friends, and that you're OK with just spending some time alone.^{[19]
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- Don't try to have the exact same schedule as the boy. Keep up your sports, outside friends, and hobbies. If you drop everything just to be with him, then it'll look like you don't value your own goals very much.
- You and the boy don't have to have the exact same friends. Continue having time with your friends and let him have his "boy time" -- your relationship will be healthier if you don't spend all of your social time together.
- Stay busy. He'll want you more if he knows that your schedule isn't wide open and that you can't have him whenever you want.
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Keep things fresh. If you want the boy to stay interested, then you have to keep mixing it up. Don't do the same old thing every day or he'll begin to get tired of the same old routine. You should try to make the relationship always feel new and exciting no matter how long you've been together.
- Pursue a new hobby together. Pick a new hobby to do together, whether it's learning how to make the best cupcakes in the world or becoming master golfers. If you do something new together every month, then your relationship will continue to feel new.^{[20]
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- Discover new places together. Don't go to dinner at the same restaurant every Friday night. Find a new place to eat and keep things interesting.
- Go out of your comfort zones together. You should both do something that makes you feel squeamish -- whether it's learning to surf or conquering your fears of spiders.
- Find a new way to tell your boyfriend how much you love him. Don't just say "I love you" every time -- be creative when you tell him how you feel.
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Know when to call it quits. If you're falling out of love, or not really feeling the love to begin with, then there's no point in forcing something that just isn't there. This will only make you both miserable. It's better to cut things off once you both know it will never work instead of letting the relationship die a slow, painful death.
- Be honest. If you really think it's not working, sit down and have a talk about parting ways.
- Don't be discouraged. Most people fall in love more than once in a lifetime, and you have a whole lifetime of falling in love with boys -- and one day, men -- ahead of you. Remember-there are many more fish in that sea! If he doesn't like you, that is okay. You can always move on. But, you can continue liking him and keep trying.

Expert Q&A
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Question

How can I impress a boy and make him love me?

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Psychotherapist
Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. Kelli also facilitates groups for those struggling with alcohol and drug addiction as well as anger management groups. She is the author of “Professor Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband” and the award-winning and best-selling book “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and is a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

Psychotherapist

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

That old cliche "be yourself" is a cliche for a reason. It's very rare for people to like somebody who's not authentic and real. Show him who you really are and avoid putting up a false sense of self. If he ends up liking you, he really likes the essence of you. If he doesn't, then you were not a good match for each other.

Warnings

Remember he needs time for himself and time with just his friends.

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Don't rush things. Give your relationship the proper amount of time to develop.

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Don't change who you are completely just to make someone fall in love with you. You may lose your sense of identity and will feel lost if your plan doesn't work out.

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If he doesn't catch on to your hook, it's likely he just doesn't want you. It's best to just move on to another guy.

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