How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You

Last Updated: February 4, 2023 References

The process of falling in love is a bit of a mystery. Sometimes it happens and people are not sure why. But there are some things that you can do to increase the odds that a special person will fall in love with you. Simple things like locking eyes, accepting favors, and smiling more can increase your love interest’s desire for you. As you look for ways to increase your desirability, you can also do things like taking care of yourself and thinking about what you really want in a partner.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Getting Someone's Attention

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Lock eyes with your love interest. Before you can get someone to fall in love with you, you have to make sure they know you exist and you are interested in them. Making eye contact is a simple, effective way to indicate your interest to someone. Research has shown that prolonged eye contact can increase feelings of attraction between two people. Use eye contact to flirt with your love interest to get them interested.^{[1]
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- Try gazing into the person’s eyes for a few minutes and then slowly turn your gaze elsewhere. Or, if a long gaze does not seem appropriate yet, try checking in with the person with frequent, quick glances.^{[2]
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2
Stand or sit in a way that mirrors your love interest's body position. Mirroring body position can also indicate your interest in a person and provide opportunities for them to do the same. For example, if the person is leaning in towards you with one arm on the table, you can lean in with the opposite arm so that you look like a mirror image of the person.^{[3]
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- Make sure that you don’t overdo this one or make it too obvious that you are trying to mirror their body position. You may even find yourself mirroring the other person without trying, which is even better because it will seem more natural.
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3
Smile and be friendly. Smiling is an easy way to show that you are interested in someone and it can also make you seem more attractive.^{[4]
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Research source} Make sure that you smile at your date now and then to indicate your interest.
- Try to keep your smile as natural and relaxed as possible. Don’t force it or smile in a way that is unusual for you.
4
Determine if the person is interested in you. As you show your interest in someone, watch for signs that they are also interested in you. If you notice that the person is also smiling, making eye contact, and facing you when they talk, then this might be a good sign. Watch for other positive body language as well, such as playing with the hair, touching your arm, or fidgeting with clothes.^{[5]
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- If someone does not seem interested in you, don’t take it personally or get discouraged. Just keep looking!
5
Ask for a date. If the person seems interested, ask if they would like to go out with you sometime. Asking someone out can be a bit scary, but if you don't ask, you might never know if they are interested in you.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 19 March 2021} Take a deep breath and just let them know that you'd like to get together sometime.
- Try taking an even more casual approach if you are nervous. Say something like, "What have you got going on this weekend?" If the response is something indefinite like, "I was thinking about going to the beach on Saturday," use it to your advantage. Try saying, "That sounds fun. Maybe later that evening we can grab some dinner together."^{[8]
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Increasing Chances that Someone will Fall in Love

1
Allow your love interest to do nice things for you. Doing nice things for someone creates more positive feelings in the person who does those nice things than it does for the person who benefits from them. For example, if you buy coffee for someone, you will have more positive feelings towards that person than they will towards you. Therefore, you should allow your love interest to do nice things for you to increase feelings of affection. Just make sure that you do not take advantage of their kindness or forget to repay the favor now and then.^{[9]
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- For example, you can let your love interest open doors for you and give you gifts for a while without reciprocating. Or, ask your love interest for a favor, like giving you a ride home or helping you with a problem.
2
Take your love interest on some exciting dates. Research has shown that putting yourself into a thrilling situation can increase your feelings of attraction for someone.^{[10]
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Research source} Use this to your benefit and plan a thrilling date with the person you want to fall in love with you. Keep in mind that this strategy may not work if the person is not fond of thrilling activities.
- For example, you could go to see a scary or action movie together, spend a day together at an amusement park, or go bungee jumping. Of course, respect the person’s fears and don’t try to force them into doing something that they are not comfortable with.
3
Consider playing hard to get. Some research has shown that people may be more likely to find others desirable if they have to work harder to spend time with them. Try spending some good quality time with your love interest while you are just getting to know each other, then make yourself unavailable for a few days. Or, you could try acting a bit distracted on one of your dates to increase the other person’s desire for you.^{[11]
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- Keep in mind that this strategy can backfire if you don’t know the person very well. This strategy is best used on someone that knows you fairly well and likes you.^{[12]
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4
Dim the lights or go on more dates at night. A dimly lit environment may increase the chances of someone falling in love with you because research has shown that large pupils make people seem more attractive. Our pupils react to things that we are interested in, so it may also be a good indicator of how much your love interest likes you.^{[13]
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- Ask your love interest to go for an evening stroll with you or pick a restaurant that uses dim lighting and candlelight.
5
Consider answering the 36 love questions with your love interest. If the person you are dating is willing, you could try Arthur Aron’s intimacy enhancement questions. These questions have led to love matches and feelings of intimacy for some people who were perfect strangers when they met. Just make sure that the other person is willing to try the activity with you. Don’t trick or coerce them.^{[14]
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- Try saying something like, “Hey, I read this weird article the other day about these 36 questions that are supposed to make any two people fall in love. Do you want to answer them with me, just for fun?”

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Finding the Right Person

1
Figure out who you are and what you want. Before you can find someone who will meet your needs, you need to get to know yourself really well. Take some time to do a personal inventory of your core values and figure out what your emotional needs are. Write them down so that you can consult your list as you search for your future partner. Some good questions to consider include:
- What is most important to you? Family? Career? A hobby? Your friends? Honesty? Loyalty? Or something else? List your values and then rank them in order of their importance.
- What do you want from a partner? Understanding? A sense of humor? Kindness? Strength? Encouragement? List the things that you want your future partner to provide in order of importance to you.
2
Identify the traits that you want your future partner to possess. Before you go out looking for someone who you would like to fall in love with you, think about what you really want in a partner. Make a list of all of the qualities that you would like your future partner to possess before you embark on your love quest.
- What traits do you want your future partner to have? Do you want someone who likes to read? Enjoys cooking? Is close to their family? Has a sense of humor? Treats you like royalty?
3
Find someone that shares your interests. People are more likely to fall in love with people who share their interests, so consider looking for someone at a club that you belong to or through some other group that you participate in. While you may be attracted to someone physically, it may not be a love match if you have nothing in common with the person.
- For example, if you volunteer at the local hospital, try getting to know your fellow volunteers. If you love to work out, try talking to people who frequent your local gym.
- You might also consider an online dating site. These sites can match you with people who share your interests, which may make it easier for you to connect with the person on your first date.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do I win my crush's heart?

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Alessandra Conti is a Celebrity Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and Co-Founder of Matchmakers In The City, a personal Matchmaking firm headquartered in Los Angeles, California. Alessandra is a Matchmaker behind MTV's, “Are You The One”, and is the go-to Celebrity Matchmaker for shows like NBC's Access Hollywood, and CBS's Face The Truth. Her dating and relationship advice has been featured on Forbes, Elite Daily, The New Yorker, The LA Times, and Fox News. For nearly 10 years, Alessandra has worked with clients ranging from celebrities to young professionals and leads a team of matchmakers responsible for hundreds of marriages through their knowledge of interpersonal relationships, body language, and lie detection. She holds a BA in Communications from American University and is a Matchmaking Institute Certified Matchmaker (CMM).

Alessandra Conti

Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Just act natural and be yourself. You want your crush to like you for who you really are.