Reading Women’s Body Language: Signs & Signals That She’s Flirting

Co-authored by Sarah Schewitz, PsyD and Hunter Rising

So a woman caught your eye from across the room and you really want to go talk to her, but how can you tell if she’s interested? Just by reading female body language, you can easily determine whether a woman wants to get to know you or just be left alone. Even though every woman flirts a little differently, there are still a lot of common signs that you can look for to know how she’s feeling. Keep reading to learn how you can read the cues in a woman’s body language so you know if she’s flirting or not.

Things You Should Know

If a woman glances in your direction, makes prolonged eye contact, flips her hair, or smiles at you, it could be a sign she wants to chat. Try making your move!
A woman is usually flirting with you if she’s mimicking your movements, leaning into your conversation, quickly blinking her eyes, or lightly touching you.
If she turns to look somewhere else, frowns, or tries to move away from you, then those are signs a woman isn’t interested.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Signs She’s Interested

1
She quickly glances in your direction. When a woman enters a room, she might dart her eyes to quickly check everyone out. Try to notice if she ever sneaks a peek in your direction. It could be a sign she’s interested if she catches your eye.^{[1]
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- If a woman looks at you from over her shoulder, she's being more seductive and playful toward you with her body language.^{[2]
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2
She holds eye contact with you. While she might glance from time to time to check you out, a longer stare is a better signal that you’ve captured her attention. When you see her peering your way, match her gaze to see how she reacts. If she holds eye contact for a few seconds before looking away, it’s a really good cue that she wants to get to know you better.^{[3]
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- If you’re sitting close enough to see her pupils, check if they’re dilated. When a woman has dilated eyes, it’s a surefire sign she’s attracted to you.^{[4]
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3
She does a head toss or hair flip. When you’re checking her out, see if the woman tilts her face up and tosses her head back. Alternatively, she may run her fingers through her hair and flip it to the side of her head. Either way, there’s a good chance that she’s trying to get your attention with her exaggerated movements.^{[5]
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4
She exposes her neck or inner wrist. A woman may push her hair behind her ear to show you her neck, or turn her hands toward you so you can see the insides of her wrists. Both of these moves are sensual signals that she’s vulnerable and wants you to come chat with her.^{[6]
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- A woman might do this from across the room or when she's having a conversation with you. If she brushes her hair away from her ear when you’re talking, it may just mean she’s trying to hear you better.
5
She fidgets with her hair or outfit. A woman may “preen” herself once you’ve seen her to make sure she’s looking her best. She may smooth out her clothes, adjust her jewelry, or fix her hair to signal that she knows you’re watching and wants you to check her out more.^{[7]
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- She may also fidget with the things around her, like tracing around the rim of her glass or picking at a napkin.
6
She smiles at you. She might start off with a small, coy smile from across the room when you make eye contact with each other. If you keep catching each other’s eye, she may switch to a bigger flirtatious smile to signal that she’s really interested and excited by thought of chatting with you.^{[8]
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- A half smile without showing teeth might mean that a woman is just being friendly. Watch her other body language to see if she’s really interested in you.
7
She moves closer to you. You see the woman from across the room and then the next time you see her, she’s a few steps closer. That’s a great sign that she’s trying to talk to you and wants to get your attention. See if she keeps moving in your direction, and try to strike up a conversation with her if she keeps approaching you.^{[9]
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Signs She’s Flirting Back

1
She has an open and relaxed posture. When a woman keeps her arms at her sides and turns toward you, she’s telling you that she feels at ease and comfortable around you. Notice if her shoulders look relaxed or if she seems tense, which could mean that she’s starting to feel uncomfortable.^{[10]
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- If you’re in a place playing music, she may sway along to the music so you notice her body.
2
She leans in closer to you. A woman who’s flirting with you will try to get closer to show that she’s paying attention and interested in what you have to say. She’ll lean her upper body forward while you’re chatting to signal her interest to you.^{[11]
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Expert Source

Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.}
3
She mirrors your movements. When a woman is attracted to you, she’ll copy some of your hand movements and your gestures. Compare your body language to hers or try doing some expressive hand movements to see if she matches your energy.^{[12]
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- Mirroring movements can also happen between good friends, so be careful not to get confused feelings if you and your best friend do the same thing.
4
She quickly blinks her eyes. While holding eye contact is a good sign a woman is into you, it’s another good sign if she blinks a lot when she’s talking to you. She may not even recognize that she’s doing it, but it could be a signal that she’s got butterflies in her stomach and she’s excited to chat with you.^{[13]
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5
She nods her head when you talk. If you’re holding a conversation, women will nod along and urge you to keep talking so they can learn more about you. She wants you to know that she’s flirting and interested in what you have to say, so she’ll give you all of her attention.^{[14]
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- If she laughs at your jokes, it’s a really good sign that she’s flirting with you.
6
She touches her hair or body. Check if the woman rubs at her neck, thighs, or face when you’re checking her out or chatting with her. It could be a sign that she has the desire to be touched and she's inviting you to break the touch barrier.^{[15]
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7
She licks or bites her lips. If a woman licks or bites her lips, she might be teasing and letting you know she’s thinking about kissing you. She might not want you to make a big move right away, but she wants to let you know that she likes you and may be interested once she gets to know you more.^{[16]
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- Some people lightly lick their lips right before they talk, so it may not mean that a woman is into you.
8
She makes physical contact with you. A woman may “accidentally” brush her hand against your arm or your leg, or she may put her hand on your shoulder when she’s chatting with you. When she breaks the touch barrier, she’s letting you know that she feels really comfortable around you and that she’s feeling fun and flirty.^{[17]
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Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
Go to source}
- Try lightly touching her back to let her know that you’re interested in her too.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Signs She’s Not Interested

1
She looks somewhere else when you catch her gaze. If you check out a woman and she immediately darts her eyes away from you, she doesn’t want to engage in a conversation. She might look toward one of her friends, an exit, or down towards her feet to signal that she’d rather be left alone for now.^{[18]
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- If she turns away as you start to approach her, then the woman would rather not chat.
2
She stops smiling or frowns. When a woman quickly changes her expression when she sees you or as she’s talking, she’s probably not interested in anything at the moment. It could mean she’s uncomfortable or just doesn’t want to chat right now.^{[19]
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Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.}
- If you said something that made her upset, apologize for what you said right away to try saving the conversation.
3
She crosses her arms. When a woman crosses her arms in front of her chest, her body language says she’s closed off toward conversations. She probably doesn’t want to engage with anyone, so it’s best if you just leave her be.^{[20]
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- She may also turn her body away from you to signal that she’s not interested.
4
She pulls away when you make physical contact. If you try getting closer and she backs away, she doesn’t want to be touched right now. She may lean backward or step further away as you get into her personal space to let you know that she’s uncomfortable and needs some room.^{[21]
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- If a woman asks you for more space, show her respect and listen to her so she feels more comfortable.

Expert Q&A
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Question

What are the signs a woman isn't interested in you?

Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Sarah Schewitz, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist by the California Board of Psychology with over 10 years of experience. She received her Psy.D. from the Florida Institute of Technology in 2011. She is the founder of Couples Learn, an online psychology practice helping couples and individuals improve and change their patterns in love and relationships.

Sarah Schewitz, PsyD

Licensed Psychologist

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

If she stops smiling or tries to turn away from you, then she probably doesn't want to keep talking.

Warnings

Avoid coming on too strong or pushing a woman’s boundaries when she doesn’t seem interested since it will make her feel even more uncomfortable.

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