How to Plan a First Date

Co-authored by Lisa Shield and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: October 22, 2021 References

Of all the dates you go on, a first date usually involves the most thought. You want to get to know the person in a fun, low-key atmosphere, but you don't want to do the same old first date formula. Instead of dinner and a movie, get creative. To help your first date go off without a hitch, we've got you covered!

1

Pick a central location.

Talk with your date to find a convenient venue for you both. Show your date that you're thinking of them by choosing a spot that's easy for them to get to. This lets them know you're considerate and you've made the date that much better by making it simple.^{[1]
X
Research source}
- For example, if you live on opposite sides of the city, look for something to do midtown or downtown.

2

Set up a low-key afternoon date.

If you don't know each other, a daytime date can be less intimidating. Plan on meeting up for an hour or so during the afternoon. This gives you a little time to decide if you'd like to see them again for a longer date or if it's not working out.^{[2]
X
Research source}
- People are busy! It can be hard to find time to fit in a first date so give a few suggestions for when you're free to meet up. Try to be flexible and work around the other person's schedule.

3

Do something simple and brief.

Drinks at a bar or coffee shop are perfect for this! That way, if the two of you don't hit it off, you aren't stuck there with each other for hours on end. If you go to a movie or concert, you're pretty much locked into that activity until it ends. That can be a bit awkward if one of you just isn't feeling it!^{[3]
X
Research source}
- Need an escape plan? No problem—tell them thanks for meeting you for drinks, but you have to meet up with friends or get a project done.
- If you're enjoying yourself, think of this as just the start of your date. You can switch venues or activities if your date's enjoying themselves too.

4

Choose an activity where you can talk.

Avoid going to a crowded bar or club that's really loud. You don't want to go to the trouble of planning a date only to realize that you can't hear a word the person's saying! Instead of choosing a busy indoor spot, go somewhere quieter so you can focus on chatting and getting to know each other.^{[4]
X
Expert Source

Lisa Shield
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.}^{[5]
X
Research source}
- Walk through a cool historic neighborhood or walk around a farmer's market. Sometimes, just strolling and chatting is the best first date!

5

Plan something affordable.

Choosing an expensive spot puts unnecessary pressure on you. A first date shouldn't break the bank, so avoid fancy places that cost a lot, especially if you think you'll hit more than one venue. Think of relaxed settings or laid-back activities you can do that will put your date at ease. Here are a few classic ideas to get you started:^{[6]
X
Research source}
- Having a picnic at the park
- Taking a stroll at the beach, river, or lake
- Walking through a neighborhood you've never been to before^{[7]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Lisa Shield
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.}
- Getting ice cream
- Playing mini golf

6

Pick an activity based on common interests.

Find out what they like to do and share your own passions. If you both love animals, go to the zoo or an animal shelter. If you're really into science or space, catch a planetarium show. Pick places that mean something to you both so your date enjoys it and gets to know you.^{[8]
X
Research source}
- If you're struggling to find a common activity or place to check out, split the date in two. Each of you plans half of the date. This also takes some of the pressure off of planning.

7

Try something adventurous.

Challenge your date to do something exciting like laser tag or skating. If you prefer getting up and moving around to sitting and talking, ask your date if they're up for something sporty. You might go rock climbing, do indoor skydiving, or play frisbee golf.^{[9]
X
Research source}
- Amusement parks are also great first-date spots. You can walk and talk in between rides or grabbing a bite to eat.

8

Pitch a unique or quirky idea.

See if they're game for trivia night or hitting an arcade. Want more of a challenge? Book an escape room and see if you can make it out in time. If you're looking for an unusual first date, maybe walk around a cemetery or go on a tour of a supposedly haunted house in your area. Get creative!^{[10]
X
Expert Source

Lisa Shield
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.}^{[11]
X
Research source}
- Take a class can be really fun. You could make pottery or try a couple's cooking class.