First dates can be a little nerve-wracking, especially if you aren’t sure how to act or what to talk about. It’s all about getting to know the other person and letting them get to know you, so be yourself! By making a good first impression and coming up with a few topics of conversation, you can have fun on your first date and learn new things about your potential romantic partner.

1

Arrange a fun activity.

  1. Choose something where you two can interact with each other. A movie date may be fun, but you probably won’t get to chat much. Try going for a walk in the park, visiting a museum, or getting coffee at a coffee shop. That way, you can get to know your date instead of sitting in silence.[1]
    • If it’s around Halloween time, try going to a pumpkin patch or visiting a corn maze.
    • If the holidays are coming up, plan to walk around your neighborhood and look at the Christmas lights.
    • When the weather is nice, consider going on a hike or a walk in nature.
    • You can make a general plan, but be open to doing something spontaneous! If you’re walking around with your date and see a fun-looking club or theater, why not pop in?
  2. Advertisement
2

Look your best.

6

Ask questions that keep the conversation going.

  1. First dates can be a little awkward. If you aren't sure what to talk about, ask your date questions they can give long answers to instead of just “yes” or “no.” Try something like, "What was the highlight of your day?" Whatever their answer is will be something that makes them excited or passionate, so it's a good way to subtly learn more about the things they really love.[6] You could also ask:[7]
    • "What’s your favorite thing to do for fun?”
    • "What’s your favorite place on earth?”
    • "Do you have any pets / want any pets?”
    • "What’s a fun, random fact about you?”
    • "What’s something you’d like to learn or wish you were better at?”
    • "What’s one thing you’re really proud of?”
8

Talk about yourself, too.

  1. If you ask too many questions, the date may start to feel like an interview. Make sure you talk about your life, your hobbies, and your passions, too. That way your date gets to know who you are. Your date might have questions of their own, or you can relate your own experiences when they’re done answering your questions.[9]
    • For example, if your date just told you they have a dog, you could say, “Oh, that’s awesome! I don’t have a dog right now, but I’d love to get one someday.”
    • There’s a fine balance between talking about yourself too much and not enough. If you feel like you’re dominating the conversation, switch to asking your date questions again.
12

Face your body toward your date.

15

Touch your date lightly on the arm or the shoulder.

16

Take your time to say goodbye.

  1. Saying goodbye is the last impression you leave your date with. Try not to rush it! Take a minute to give your date a hug or a handshake. If you’d like to, talk about plans for getting in touch in the future.[17]
    • You could say something like, “I really had a good time tonight. Would you like to do this again sometime?”
    • Not every date will be a winner. If you’re wrapping up the date and you don’t want to go on another one, give your date a handshake and just thank them for the nice time without committing to anything else.
    • If you’re both feeling it, you could go in for a quick kiss. However, not everyone likes to kiss on the first date, so don’t feel pressured to.

Community Q&A
Did you know you can get answers researched by wikiHow Staff? Unlock staff-researched answers by supporting wikiHow

  • Question
    What if I already asked them to a date at the movies?
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer
    This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer

    Support wikiHow by unlocking this staff-researched answer.

    That's fine! A movie date can be fun too. Consider going somewhere before or after so you can talk with your date one on one. Maybe head to a diner for a late-night burger, or grab a quick coffee at a coffee shop.
  • Question
    Is it oversharing to admit to your date that you read wikiHow articles on how to act on a first date because you were so nervous? Is it possible they would find the honesty endearing?
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer
    This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer

    Support wikiHow by unlocking this staff-researched answer.

    They'd probably find it endearing! It's a good way to break the ice and let your date know that you're a little nervous, since they're probably a little nervous too.
  • Question
    How do I initiate a first kiss?
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer
    This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer

    Support wikiHow by unlocking this staff-researched answer.

    If you both had a good time on your date and you feel like doing in for the kiss, take a second to pause as you say goodbye and look into your date's eyes. Slowly lean in, then give them a quick kiss on the lips before pulling back.
Advertisement

About This Article

Imad Jbara
Co-authored by:
Dating Coach
This article was co-authored by Imad Jbara and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth. This article has been viewed 210,615 times.
20 votes - 79%
Co-authors: 17
Updated: August 25, 2021
Views: 210,615
Categories: First Dates
Article SummaryX

If you’re unsure how to act on a first date, make sure you turn your phone off or on silent so you can give your date your full attention. Don’t be afraid to compliment them on their appearance and personality by saying something like, “Wow. You have a really nice smile.” To start interesting conversations, ask open-ended questions like, “What was it like where you grew up?” When they ask you questions back, try to give detailed answers instead of a few words to tell them about who you are too. In general, if you aim to listen to your date for as long as you talk, you should maintain a balanced conversation. For more tips, including how to monitor your body language on a first date, read on!

Did this summary help you?
Advertisement