How to Sing In Church Without Feeling Embarrassed

Co-authored by wikiHow Staff

Last Updated: August 12, 2022 References

Singing in church can be one of the most potent forms of worship. Feeling embarrassed or nervous about singing in public is a normal reaction that can be overcome through improving your confidence and developing your singing voice. Ultimately, it's more important that singing makes you happy than if it sounds good.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Building Your Confidence

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Let go of past embarrassment. What has already happened is over; you've survived. Don't drag yourself down by dwelling on old events.
- Think about why you felt or still feel embarrassed. Making mistakes is part of being human. If your anxiety stems from having unreasonable expectations, remember that you aren't perfect.
- Laugh at yourself.^{[1]
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- Assess your strengths, weaknesses, and limitations. Being humble about your abilities will help you feel confident about what you can accomplish.
- Be responsible for your errors. If your embarrassment stems from a simple mistake, owning up to it is the first step towards being getting over it and being confident.
2
Embrace your unique voice. There are many types of voices, and just because yours is different doesn't necessarily mean that it's bad ^{[3]
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- Don't apologize for your singing voice. There is no true right or wrong voice.
- Singing, especially in church, is about the happiness and meaning the act brings you, not necessarily about how you sound.
- Concentrate on group singing. Your voice may blend better when singing with the congregation or the choir.
- Remain hopeful no matter how you sound. Use positive reinforcement and convince yourself you sound fine. Tell yourself, "It doesn't matter what happens. I will persevere and sing with my heart."
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Find out why singing is meaningful to you. The act of singing in church is considered a form of prayer. Focus on the fellowship. It is referenced within the Bible as being a way to praise God: "Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord," Ephesians 5:19. ^{[4]
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- What makes singing powerful is the positive feelings it can bring. "Come let us sing for joy to the Lord," Psalms 95:1.
- Remember that you are singing for a community, which can be both comforting and empowering. There is nothing but love and support in the congregation.
- Search for a song that conveys your feelings of love, worship, and faith. There are even some contemporary songs that have deep religious meanings.

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Improving Your Singing

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Work on your singing technique. Improve your posture, breathe correctly with your diaphragm, and use the appropriate throat technique. Having the right technique can make a significant difference in how you sound.
- Always do a proper warm-up before singing. It will help your voice to sound its best and will prevent potential injuries.
- An easy fix to performance anxiety while singing is to slow your breathing down. ^{[5]
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  Research source} Getting embarrassed can cause your breathing to become rapid and shallow, which can affect your voice.
- Improve your voice without lessons by working on scales. The melodic start of "Do Re Mi" is familiar to us all, and helps train ears to hear correct sounds regardless of the key.
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Practice! Your voice is formed by several muscles, which require diligent exercise. Training your singing voice to sound differently takes practice everyday.
- Sing as often as you can; sing in the shower, sing in the car, sing around the house. Practice anything from humming your favorite commercial ditty to singing church hymns.
- Record and listen to yourself singing to gauge your pitch, technique, and overall sound. It can help you recognize the improvements you've made. Also, hearing your voice repeatedly played back can help you become more comfortable with how you sound.
- Restrict your singing time. Focus on practice sessions of 20 minutes per day. Practicing too long can cause undue stress on the vocal muscles and put you out of commission for an extended period.^{[6]
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Join a choir. Participating in choir is not only a great opportunity to boost your community involvement, but it's a perfect learning opportunity to improve your singing technique and bolster your confidence.
- By singing in a group, you may feel less isolated and self-conscious than in singing individually.
- There is evidence that regular participation in group choral activity can greatly improve physical and mental health. ^{[7]
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- Try harmonizing. Your singing voice may not currently be strong enough individually, but as a complement to the primary melody your voice may resonate beautifully.^{[8]
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Take private singing lessons. The assistance of a professional voice coach can help you improve on your vocal range, singing technique, and confidence. Lessons can range in cost from $10-$75 for a half-hour, depending on the area and the voice coach's expertise and reputation.
- Be sure your vocal coach diagnoses your vocal status. Not only do you both need to know your current abilities, but there also needs to be an expectation of the desired outcome.
- Do your research on voice coaches in your area to decide which option is best for you. There are even online vocal coaches if you can't find someone perfect in your area.
- A voice coach can help, over time, make your voice sound the best it can be. They can't make you sound like someone else or make you immediately sound amazing. Be patient and reasonable.

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Asking Others for Help

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Solicit your friends. Close acquaintances and friends will be more likely to critically evaluate your voice. Sing for few friends to gauge their collective opinion of your abilities.
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Ask the choir for assistance. In most choirs there are bound to be countless years of experience and several strong voices. Seek opinions of those whom you admire, and follow their advice or guidance. They may even be willing to train you.
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Pick the music director's brain. Someone with years of musical experience may likely know how to help. He/she may suggest one of the following ideas:
- There may be methods to accentuate the positives in your voice. Perhaps longer stretches of low notes or a specifically timed vibrato would work well.
- Your voice might be better suited to specific songs. A specific hymn that fits your range could really display your natural abilities.
- Simple voice control could be achieved more effectively via proper volume, chin position, and jaw angle.^{[9]
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Consult with a doctor about social phobia. There may be much more to your embarrassment than just your singing voice.^{[10]
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National Institute of Mental Health
Informational website from U.S. government focused on the understanding and treatment of mental illness.
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- Millions of people are affected by social phobias that often extend to anxiety and depression.
- The doctor may be able to help you if you are extremely self-conscious or worry excessively before singing. Treatment can potentially be psychotherapy, medication, or both.
- Social phobias may extend simply beyond your singing. Don't let issue extend into other parts of your life.

Community Q&A

Question

How can I sing without getting nervous?

Community Answer

It's normal to get nervous before performing, especially in front of a crowd of people. Here are a few things you can do to combat the nerves: take deep breaths (this will tell your mind and body that everything is OK); eat a snack, even if you don't feel hungry; and imagine everyone in their underwear, that way they're not nearly as intimidating.
Question

What if I need to breathe in the middle of the song?

Community Answer

Try to take your breaths between phrases and work on breath support when doing warm ups. If you have trouble mastering this, ask for help from the choir leader.
Question

What should I do if I don't know the song that is being sung?

Community Answer

You could hum along quietly or just listen respectfully.