How to Ask a Girl for Her Number Online

Written by Imad Jbara | Edited by Kira Jan

Last Updated: May 21, 2022

You’ve matched with a cute girl, started trading messages, and now you’re ready to take things to the next level. Getting a girl’s number is the first step to move from matching online to meeting up IRL. But what exactly should you say to get those digits? We’ve asked our team of dating experts and we’ll share their pro tips. First, we’ll walk you through a smooth, effortless way to lead up to your request. Then, we’ll share the top 11 ways to ask for a girl’s number online—and boost your chances of getting it.

This article is based on an interview with our dating coach, Imad Jbara. Check out the full interview here.

Section 1 of 2:

What to Do Before You Ask for Her Number

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Use common interests to build a connection. Most women won’t feel comfortable giving out their number to a complete stranger. But by exchanging a few quality messages, you can show her you’re trustworthy and safe. Ask about interests from her profile.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} Relate to what she says to spark a genuine connection.^{[2]
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Research source} Remember, you want to make her feel like you “get” her.
- “I’m a Marvel fan, too. Who’s the best Spider-Man: Tom Holland or Toby Maguire?”
- “I’m so glad you’re a fellow dog lover. What’s Benson like?”
- “Finally! Another coffee snob. What’s your take on pour-overs?”
2
Build attraction with playful, funny compliments. Hint that you’re interested in her, and show her you’re confident by throwing out a compliment or two. You can compliment either her profile or her personality.^{[3]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} Just avoid NSFW comments (unless she initiates that) so she’ll feel comfortable giving you her number.
- “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be able to restore my faith in this app… But I think you might’ve just done it.”
- “When I first saw your profile I thought, ‘I’d let that girl steal my favorite hoodie.’ It’d probably look better on you, anyway.”
- Send, “Ok you’re pretty funny.” Then send, “Sorry. Typo. *pretty and funny.”
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Check to see whether she’s interested in you. You can improve your chances of getting her number if the conversation seems like it’s going well. Here’s a checklist of crucial questions to ask yourself before you make your move:
- How long are the messages she’s sending? If her messages are interesting and longer than a few words, she’s probably interested.
- What’s her response time like? If she’s taking forever to respond, she might not be interested. But if she’s matching your speed, that’s a great sign.^{[4]
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  Expert Source
  
  Imad Jbara
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- Is she asking you questions? Questions show interest, and they mean she really wants to get to know you.^{[5]
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  Expert Source
  
  Imad Jbara
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- Is she using emojis and exclamation points? Punctuation matters! Emojis and exclamation points definitely point towards a flirtier vibe.

Section 2 of 2:

The Best Ways to Ask for a Girl’s Number Online

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By the way, what’s your number? Try casually asking for her number like it’s not a big deal. You’ll come off as confident and cool. Wondering when to hit send? The best time to ask for her number is in the middle of a fun conversation when the positive vibes are flowing.^{[6]
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Expert Source

Connell Barrett
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.}
- “This has been so fun. Could I get your number?”
- “Hey, would you feel comfortable giving me your number?”
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I really like talking to you—can I get your number? Give her a compliment when you ask for her number. By doing that, you show that you’re trying to get her digits as a way to further your connection.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Connell Barrett
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.}
- “I love your sense of adventure. Could I get your number so we could keep talking over text?”^{[8]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Imad Jbara
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “Ok, you’ve made me laugh nonstop for the last 12 messages. Can I please get your number?”
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How about we continue this conversation over text? This approach offers a pretty natural way to get her number. If you two have established a fun back-and-forth, smoothly suggest texting instead. If she says yes and gives you her number, you’ve got a stress-free first text—just pick up the conversation where you left off.
- “I’ve got a burning follow-up question to what you just said. Can I text it to you?”
- Try sending part of a joke and then saying, “Can I text you the punchline? What’s your number?”
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If I had your number, we could pretend we didn’t meet on here. Make a joke about the app for an easy way to find common ground. Pretty much everyone has had an experience on a dating app they’d like to forget. By sending this message, you’re saying, “Hey, let’s get out of here.” The reference to “we” also helps build rapport—like you’re already a team or on the same side.
- “I feel like we’re past the awkward Bumble messaging stage. Could I get your number?”
- “Hey, they say these apps are numbers games so… could I get yours?”
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I’m not a huge fan of dating apps, want to text instead? Try this message if you’re looking for a more serious connection. Telling her you’re not into dating apps immediately says “I don’t play games.” If she’s on the same page, she’ll probably respect that you’re straightforward.
- “Want to keep taking over text? I’m eager to get off this crazy app.”
- “I feel like we could both us a break from this app. Want to switch to texting?”
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I don’t have notifications on here, do you want to exchange numbers? Give a reason why it makes sense to switch to texting.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} That way, your request won’t seem awkward or too forward. As a bonus, telling her you’ve turned off notifications hints that you aren’t desperate for matches.
- “I want to see a pic of your new puppy! Since we can’t send photos here, would you feel comfortable texting instead?”
- “I don’t check this app super often, but I’d love to keep talking. Could I get your number?”
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I’m about to log off, wanna send me your number? Add a time limit into the conversation so she’ll be more likely to respond. By making yourself available, but not too available, you show her you’ve got a fun, exciting life offline.
- “I’ve got to go to work, but send me your number and I’ll text you later!”
- “I’m headed on vacation this weekend and won’t be on the app. If you send me your number, we can text, though!”
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I think talking on the phone is a better way to get to know someone, what do you think? Approach messaging and texting as a way to get to live communication, like a phone call or video chat. Asking to talk on the phone is a totally acceptable request. Plus, it shows you’re serious. After all, it’s easier to see if you click with someone when you can hear their voice.^{[10]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “Call me old school, but would you be down for a phone call? If so, what’s your number?”
- “Hey, no pressure but do you want to call?”
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Hey, I have an idea—shoot me your number and I’ll text you! Drop a hint that you’ve got something exciting planned. If she wants to find out what it is, she’ll have to give you her number first. Once you’ve got her number, you can follow up with a fun date idea.
- “I just thought of something kind of wild. Could I get your number so I can text it to you?”
- “I have the funniest idea for a date (if you’re up for it). Can I text it to you?”
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My number’s (456) 930-5555, feel free to reach out! Switch things up by giving her your number.^{[11]
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Research source} When you give her the power to text you first, you can get a good read on whether she’s really into you. If she texts you quickly, you know she’s interested!^{[12]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “Hey, I’ve had fun talking to you. My number’s (858) 029-7890 if you want to keep talking.”
- “I think you’re really interesting. If you want to text, hit me up at (456) 927-0019.”
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Could I get your number before our date? If you’ve already set up a date, you can’t lose with this strategy. It makes total sense to ask for her number in case something comes up or you need to confirm the details of your outing.
- “What’s your number—I’ll text you the info!”
- “Hey, could I get your number in case anything comes up?”