This article was co-authored by Leah Morris. Leah Morris is a Life and Relationship Transition coach and the owner of Life Remade, a holistic personal coaching service. With over three years as a professional coach, she specializes in guiding people as they move through both short-term and long-term life transitions. Leah holds a BA in Organizational Communication from California State University, Chico and is a certified Transformational Life Coach through the Southwest Institute for Healing Arts.
There are 32 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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No one is perfect. Not you, not me, not even the most beautiful, successful people on the planet. Perfection is unattainable. But what is attainable is making people wonder if you are. Here's how to make people doubt whether or not perfection is so elusive after all.
Steps
On the Outside
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1Practice good hygiene. Staying fresh and clean gives you the building blocks to work toward your best self. Develop a routine that leaves you feeling squeaky clean and smelling great.[1] Remember to always scrub areas such as elbows, necks and knees due to the bacteria you bring home each day. The bacteria will cause your elbows to turn darker if you have a pale skintone.
- Shower daily. Pick out a body soap that appeals to you and scrub down! Don't feel obligated to wash your hair every day (in fact, that could dry it out), but do wash up regularly, especially after workouts.
- Pick out a shampoo and conditioner for your hair type. Use a deep treatment every so often to increase your hair's natural shine.
- Brush your teeth (and tongue!) at least twice a day. Make it a habit when you get up and right before go to bed. A whitening toothpaste will make your pearly whites glisten even more.[2]
- While you're at it, floss and use mouthwash! Not only are they good habits to have, but they reduce your chances of gum disease and tooth decay.[3]
- Use deodorant.[4]
Throughout the day, our body releases oils and odors that don't always help us look our best. Using deodorant regularly prevents any unnecessary smells from creeping out of nooks and crannies.
- Don't douse yourself in perfume or cologne. A light spray is a good idea, but smelling you from across the street, even if you smell like a field of daisies, is overpowering and less than ideal.
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2Get a good night's rest. Not only does 8 hours of sleep a night make you feel energized and ready for the day, it benefits your appearance and quality of life.[5] (Prevents darker bags under your eyes too!)[6]
- Circulation increases in our sleep. That means our skin is receiving the most nutrients it receives at night, preparing it to look healthier and glow.[7]
- Sleep and metabolism are controlled by the same areas of the brain. Studies have shown that participants who get more sleep lose more fat than their counterparts, who lose more muscle.[8]
- Sleep allows our brains time to consolidate memories. Not only does a healthy amount of sleep make for easier recall, but the same restructuring of memories spurs the creative process.[9] Our attention is sharpened, making it easier to focus (and get better grades!).
- Sleeping around 8 hours a night spurs athleticism, too. Athletes who slept around 10 hours a night experienced less daytime fatigue and faster running times.[10]
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3Care for your skin. Depending on your skin type, this could mean different things. But whatever skin you're in, develop a regimen catered to it.[11]
- Know your skin type. If you have dry skin, use a heavier, more moisturizing cleanser. If you have oily skin, stick to something light and oil-free. Wash up at least once a day to remove dirt and residue.
- If you have acne, use treatments containing salicylic acid or benzoyl peroxide to combat blemishes on your own.[12] If that's not working, consider seeing a dermatologist. Don't pop your zits--they'll scar your face and lead to more.[13] Make-up works to cover them up in case of an emergency, but it clogs pores and can lead to more breakouts in the future.
- Protect your skin from the sun;[14] even 15 minutes outside can start the process rolling. Use moisturizers and lip balms with SPF 15. Pale will always be more in than splotchy and wrinkly.
- Don't forget, part of skin is nails! How long or short you want them is up to you, but be sure to remove sharp edges and keep them clean. And don't miss your toes!
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4Style your hair. Every person has a different ideal hairstyle. Experiment with a few or consult a stylist.
- If you've found a style you're happy with, maintain it well. Trim your hair every 6 to 8 weeks and remove tangles with a wide-toothed comb.[15] Too much brushing can put stress on your scalp and hair.
- Stay away from heat treatments and appliances. Unnatural levels of heat dry out your hair and weaken it, causing it to damage. Air dry your hair as often as possible.[16]
- Styling men's hair follows the same general principles.
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5Go natural. Anyone wearing too much make-up is sending the world the message that they are not beautiful on their own. Stay natural-looking to seem organically perfect.[17]
- Use powders to soak up shine.
- Blush and tinted lip balm will give your visage a rosy, sun-kissed look (without the damage).
- Use a bit of mascara to lengthen and accentuate your eyelashes.
- If you have skin issues (or an occasion to wear more), familiarize yourself with how to wear concealer and foundation. Worn right it can look good, but worn wrong, it can look absolutely horrendous.
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6Dress to your ideals. There is no one "perfect" look; in fact, the look that is best on you is the one you are the most comfortable in.
- Whatever clothes you choose, make sure they're clean. Dirty is never trendy.
- Don't concern yourself with being fashionable. Trends come and go and it'll be exhausting keeping up. Instead, develop your own style and set them yourself. Your money will last longer and you'll be happier being yourself.
- Wear clothes that fit and are appropriate. Too tight and you're trying too hard, too loose and your left hand is wasted holding them up. When trying on clothes, consider all angles and move around before buying.
On the Inside
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1Be confident.[18] A person that lights up a room is the one everyone wants to be around. Acting confident--whether you are or not--is the first step to presenting the image you're aiming for.[19]
- Hold your head high! Body language speaks much more loudly than words. Keeping your back straight and your chin up causes people to notice your presence and self-assuredness.
- Make eye contact. Let others know you're paying attention to them. If you shy away from their gaze, you'll seem nervous and inhibited. Confidence is not only sexy, but gains others' trust more quickly.
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2Smile. Happiness is contagious.[20] If you're the one who's always funny and smiling, others will be naturally drawn to you.
- Not only will those around you feel the mood lift, but you will too! Your brain takes cues from your muscles; smile and soon you'll feel it's natural, even if it wasn't in the first place.[21]
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3Be healthy. When you're feeling crappy, everything is harder to do. Being perfect is much easier to manage when you feel and look your best.
- Stick to a healthy, balanced diet.[22] When we treat our bodies, we treat ourselves. Loading up on whole grains, fruits, and vegetables not only prevents weight gain, but it also leads to more energy, lower risk of disease, and a longer life. Stay away from too many processed goods--they often lack nutrients and are high in unhealthy, unnatural sugars.
- Stay active. Exercising has shown to make skin glow and lead to better sleep, in addition to its numerous health benefits.[23] Even taking a walk a few times a week will help to clear your mind, complexion, and leave you feeling more relaxed.
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4Love yourself. In order to be truly confident and beautiful, you must love the skin you're in. This may seem difficult, but, luckily, you are the only obstacle in your way from true self-acceptance.[24]
- Write down a list of all your good qualities. If that's a struggle, ask others what they think. Go over this list every morning, adding qualities as you notice them.
- Stay positive![25] If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts, immediately stop.[26] The negative thoughts are completely controllable. If they keep on returning, busy yourself with an activity. If you need to, get it all out in a journal. Bottling an emotion up leads to stress and frustration.
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5Open your mind. With a closed mind, we cannot see perfection in all its forms. The world out there is large and you may not have all the information. As you form opinions, put yourself in others' shoes.
- Keeping open-minded will lead to positivity, empathy, and understanding--attributes all humans are attracted to. You'll be more open-minded about your own flaws, the shortcomings of others, and the less glowing facts about our world. Others will see that you accept them for who they are and they, in turn, will be more likely to accept you.
- Let things go.[27] Being bogged down by those who have hurt or betrayed you weighs down your spirit. Happiness, positivity, and confidence--keys to being perfect--are not attainable if you're caught up in grudges and revenge. Forgive, forget, and move on. You don't have time for negativity anymore. This new, perfect you is better than that.[28]
Carrying It Out
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1Pursue your goals. Whatever they are, go for them. A person with ambition and motivation is often unstoppable.
- Your goals can be concrete or abstract. Write them down. Next to them, write how you will do this. It could be something internal, as in "I want to be more confident. In the coming weeks, I will 1) start a conversation with someone new, 2) put myself in front of a group of people, and 3) ask a guy/girl for their phone number." Or, it could be an external goal: "I want to save an extra $500 a month. This will be attained by limiting myself to eating out once a week, riding my bike to work, and working 15 extra hours a month."
- Stick to them.[29] When you start seeing them fulfilled, your inner sense of worth and pride will swell. After all, most of the battle of being perfect is believing you're perfect.
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2Master a skill. If you're creative, sing, paint, or dance. If you're athletic, get on the field. If you're tech-savvy, build a computer. Doing something well not only makes us interesting and multi-dimensional (and give us more things to talk about), but it leads to new and different opportunities.[30]
- Correlate these skills with your goals. If you want to make more money, how can you do that with your skill set? Start a side business? Sell your paintings? If you want to lose weight, how can you cater to that? Cook vegetarian or low-fat dishes? Take your nature-loving side to the hiking trails? Look into yourself for the answers--they'll come the easiest.
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3Keep on learning. Your personality is multi-faceted; you're not just a pretty face. Read up on current events and topics that interest you to be an interesting conversationalist.
- On top of being dynamic and well-read, you'll be a problem solver and quick to engage. "Uh oh, your potatoes sprouted early, huh? Should've put an apple in there!" "Yes, I read about that! What do you think will be the implications of China's new stance?"
- Don't forget about the benefits for yourself. You'll be able to make better, more informed decisions and understand the bigger picture. What's more, having a mind for learning opens up job prospects and more paths to financial success.[31]
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4Be kind.[32] If you're intelligent, confident, and skilled, it doesn't matter unless you put those qualities to good use. Take opportunities to make others' lives easier. Being smart and beautiful is great, but being smart, beautiful, sympathetic, and giving is near perfect.
- Help others. When you see someone struggling--be it with too many groceries or a math problem--offer your help. You'll put a smile on their face, which will put a smile on yours.
- Be polite and respectful.[33] T If someone is different or feels differently than you, take a step back before you judge. You may not fully understand where they're coming from and simply require clarification.
- Helping others doesn't end when you leave the room. Clean up after yourself and make things easier for your friends and family by being thoughtful. If a family member cooked dinner, volunteer to clean the dishes. If a friend missed class, get her the notes. Take small opportunities to make the world around you brighter.
- In addition to being kind to those around you, be kind to the planet! It's the only one we have. Don't litter or use electricity excessively. Ride your bicycle or carpool when you can and used recycled goods if available.
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5Be a good friend.[34] Be a friend to those who get bullied by others. Being perfect does not have to be a selfish endeavor. In fact, being perfect often means putting others first.[35]
- Consider others' desires in addition to what you want. What's good for you, may not be good for the whole. Always thinking "me, me, me" will make you a person others don't want to be around and aren't impressed by.
- Keep your promises. If you say you'll do something, do it. You have loads of obligations, so don't make promises you can't keep. The last thing you want is to be called a liar or a flake.
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6Stick to your values. Knowing yourself and what you value will make it easier to make good decisions and become the person you want to become. Don't make excuses for dishonesty or hypocrisy. If you know it's right, it doesn't matter whether or not it's popular.
- Surround yourself with like-minded people. It's too easy to get caught up in a crowd that forgets about respect, positivity, and growth. Negative influences will stand in your way of becoming your best self.
Community Q&A
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QuestionI am transgender. I was born female. I still want to be good in school and have good friends, though. What do I do?Community AnswerCultivate a good personality. Be kind and helpful to others, and show them that, despite being transgender, you're just like them. If people tease you or bully you, ignore them. I'm sure there are plenty of nice people who would love to be your friend. As for being a good student, all you really have to do is pay attention in class, turn in all your assignments on time, and study hard. If you don't understand the material, ask a teacher for help.
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QuestionHow can I become an honor student?Emma CollinsCommunity AnswerTry to get all As and Bs. This will make your GPA go higher, and depending on what grade you're in, will get you to the Honor Roll.
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QuestionI will never be as beautiful as any of my family and friends. I cry a lot and get angry, how do I make myself feel better about myself?Emma CollinsCommunity AnswerKnow that there will always be someone more beautiful as you. But remember there are probably people who look up to you and think "Woah, I'll never be as pretty as __". Don't forget that if you act confident and stay calm, eventually you will feel that way all the time, and it's contagious.
Warnings
- Never do anything that makes you uncomfortable or goes against your values in striving for perfection.⧼thumbs_response⧽
- "Perfect" does not exist. Striving for something unattainable may make you very unhappy. Think of "perfect" as your best, ideal self. That, however, is attainable.⧼thumbs_response⧽
References
- ↑ http://www.health.gov.au/internet/publications/publishing.nsf/Content/ohp-enhealth-manual-atsi-cnt-l~ohp-enhealth-manual-atsi-cnt-l-ch3~ohp-enhealth-manual-atsi-cnt-l-ch3.7
- ↑ https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/taking-care-your-teeth-and-mouth
- ↑ http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Does_flossing_prevent_heart_disease
- ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-wear-deodorant_n_566a1b6ae4b080eddf57c06a
- ↑ http://healthysleep.med.harvard.edu/healthy/matters/benefits-of-sleep
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/bags-under-eyes/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20369931
- ↑ http://spryliving.com/articles/sleep-softer-skin/
- ↑ 9.09.19.2http://www.health.com/health/gallery/0,,20459221_6,00.html
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/skin-care/art-20048237
- ↑ https://www.aad.org/public/diseases/acne-and-rosacea/10-things-to-try-when-acne-wont-clear
- ↑ https://www.aad.org/public/diseases/acne-and-rosacea/pimple-popping-why-only-a-dermatologist-should-do-it
- ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/cancer/skin/basic_info/sun-safety.htm
- ↑ https://www.allure.com/gallery/when-to-get-a-haircut
- ↑ https://www.insider.com/mistakes-styling-hair-2018-3#you-grab-the-blow-dryer-right-after-your-shower-6
- ↑ https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8355/15-natural-ways-to-maintain-beautiful-youthful-skin.html
- ↑ https://www.lifehack.org/683919/how-to-be-more-confident-the-definitive-step-by-step-guide
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/changepower/201805/how-be-more-self-confident-in-just-3-minutes-day
- ↑ https://www.webmd.com/balance/news/20081204/happiness-is-contagious
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201206/there-s-magic-in-your-smile
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/eat-well/
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/fitness/in-depth/exercise/art-20048389
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-main-ingredient/201512/loving-yourself-how-guide
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2016/08/23/3-powerful-ways-to-stay-positive/#6557351619c9
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2018/04/25/11-ways-to-stop-negative-thought-patterns-and-move-forward/#2d7b57319ffb
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-emotional-meter/201708/important-tips-how-let-go-and-free-yourself
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/learning-to-let-go-of-past-hurts-5-ways-to-move-on/
- ↑ https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/6-things-every-day-ensure-you-stick-your-goals.html
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2012/11/how-to-master-a-new-skill
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2017/02/lifelong-learning-is-good-for-your-health-your-wallet-and-your-social-life
- ↑ https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/30-ways-kind-and-happier.html
- ↑ https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/politeness.html
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/brain-waves/201712/how-be-good-friend
- ↑ https://tinybuddha.com/blog/25-ways-to-be-a-true-friend/
About This Article
While no one can be perfect, there are things you can do to feel like the best version of yourself, like getting a good night's sleep every night, practicing good hygiene, and taking care of your skin. You should also try to find a style that you feel confident in, regardless of how trendy it is. Also, don't forget about the way you treat others, since being a good friend and being kind will make other people view you in a better light. For more advice, like how to be more confident, keep reading!