How to Be Attractive to Girls

Co-authored by Eddy Baller

Being attractive to girls is about figuring out your best qualities and making them shine. Pursuing your passions and being kind and respectful will get you a long way. You don't need to change who you are to be more attractive. You just want to work on being the best you that you can be!

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Presenting Your Appearance

1
Become physically fit. Many people think that you have to lift weights to get fit. This is not the case. You can do a full work out without a gym membership. Push-ups work your chest and triceps massively while crunches work your abs. You also want to try step out of the house for your cardio by biking, running, or swimming.^{[1]
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- Do sit ups by putting your calf/feet on the seat of a chair, with your back on the ground. Then put your hands on the back of your head and move your head towards the ceiling.
- Exercising not only tones your body to promote your attractiveness, it also gives you more energy and confidence.
2
Dress to attract. Dressing your age tells a lot about your personality. It is proven that a guy who dresses like he is 16 isn’t as attractive as a guy wearing a mature look. You don't have to wear a sport coat but a simple upgrade to your style will help. Invest in chinos and nicer jeans instead of continuing to wear old worn out denim. Go for slim cuts in both your top and bottom. Try out several colors and pick the ones that accent your attributes (hair, skin, and eye color) the most.
- Look after your shoes. Discard your sneakers after they start to rip or loss their thread. Care for your leather shoes by treating them twice a year.^{[2]
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- Also, a good thing to take into account is the feel of your clothes. When you break the touch barrier, girls like things that feel nice and it's also important that you feel physically comfortable in them.
- One technique to attract someone is by wearing an eye-catching outfit.
- Scientifically, women are more inclined to be attracted to a man wearing red. It’s the same reason a cop is more inclined to pull over a red sedan over a blue sedan. Red catches the eye.^{[3]
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3
Maintain your personal hygiene. Take care of your body and smell nice. Take a shower everyday and use shampoo and soap products that compliment your body. Find a deodorant that smells good with a pinch of musk. Consider a touch of cologne for those special dates, but never use more than two squirts. Brush your teeth regularly, at least twice a day, and use other dental hygiene-related items like floss and mouthwash.
- Consider using lotion for the colder months so your skin stays moist and healthy to the touch.^{[4]
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4
Uphold good posture. This is something simple that'll increase your daily presentation. It is easy to miss this when most jobs require you to slouch over a computer at a desk. Straightening your posture will make you look taller, stronger, and more confident.^{[5]
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- Imagine your upper torso is molded on a coat hanger.
5
Eat well. Eating well not only helps with your body image, but it helps yourself in several ways. Improving your diet can increase your energy, confidence, and your general well-being. These factors will help embellish other features of yourself that a woman may find attractive. Start small and be sure to drink enough water everyday (about eight glasses).
- Increase the amount of fruits and vegetables you consume.
- Avoid carb heavy meals like bread, potatoes, pastas, and rice. You can eat these as long as they are paired with other foods that hold higher nutritional benefits.^{[6]
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Having a Good Personality

1
Pursue a passion. Women are attracted to men with a passion in their lives. It is attractive to live outside the cookie cutter routine of eat, work, sleep, and repeat. Pick up a hobby and plan to change your hobby into your passion. Try your hand at a musical instrument, a craft like pottery, cooking, writing, running, rock-climbing, and more.
- When you express a sincere passion she will respond positively.^{[7]
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- Life is too short not be passionate about something. Don’t be bashful and try your luck at something. There is nothing to lose unless you get into extreme sports.
2
Talk to women more often. Just relax when you’re talking to a girl. Women like it when a guy is direct; they are not mind readers. Speaking to someone you don’t know can produce a lot of anxiety for some. You can approach someone without opening yourself up to being evaluated. Eventually, you'll be confident enough to talk to them in a normal conversation. Try some of these cues:
- Ask a small favor like “can you watch my stuff while I get coffee?” This creates attraction from the person doing the favor.
- Ask a question. Use whatever situation/location you are in to your advantage. Ask a relevant question like “have you seen this band before?” or “you think Texas could be a country?” Be whimsical if you are feeling it.^{[8]
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3
Practice respect and kindness. A great way to prove yourself to a woman is showing her that you not only respect her, but all women. It is too common for guys to view picking up girls as a macho competition instead of wanting to get to know a woman. You can show respect by listening to what she has to say, respecting her personal space, making sure not to interrupt her, and refraining from making statements like “you wouldn’t want to do that, it’s a guy thing.”^{[9]
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- Never make fun of a girl when you’re trying to tease them. A little bit of joking is okay, but avoid anything that could be taken as offensive by someone.
- Generosity also goes a long way. No one likes a guy who is too stingy to have a good time. The same can be said about someone who refuses to give a dollar from time to time.
4
Take risks to have fun. Be a fun person by acting on spontaneity. It is attractive and more interesting to be around someone willing to go on an adventure. This can also show her how interesting you can be.
- Being silly and having fun also shows you’re confident and not afraid of taking risks.
5
Be intellectually curious. Careful not to be a know-it-all or overly pretentious. Most girls will like a guy who reads from time to time and is interested in the world around him. Put down the video game and pick up a book. Try getting into the habit of reading the news every morning. You’ll have more to add to a conversation when you are on top of current events.^{[10]
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- Not every girl cares about this.
6
Use your sense of humor. Making someone laugh is a great thing and it is attractive. It is one of the most desirable traits women look for in a man. Don’t modify your humor to appeal to someone in particular. Your natural humor will attract the type of person who you’ll be able to relax around.
- Laughter affects people on a chemical level. It increases the level of serotonin in our brains which causes our brain's function to work more efficiently.^{[11]
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7
Be a confident person. This doesn't always have to do with your looks, but how you think of yourself. Have confidence that you'll achieve your goals. Change your mentality: if you think you're attractive you will be attractive. Thinking positively is the first step, but then to ‘’act’’ positively will increase your self-esteem even more. This can be simple like talking to people in a positive manner and focus your energy into acting this way.
- Have ambitions for your life. When you have a serious drive for your life, women will take notice.
- Change one of your bad habits. Start small like waking up without hitting snooze two or three times or drinking 64 ounces of water a day. Start small and progressively work to improve yourself in larger ways.
- Do something you’ve been procrastinating. There is no time like the present. It can even be a small thing like cleaning your room.^{[12]
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Determining Who You are Attracting

1
Look for signals of flirting. There are some universal signals that are used frequently. This is a classic flirt used by women: a girl smiles at you and then lifts her eyebrows quickly while locking into eye contact.^{[13]
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Research source} Don’t rely on someone to initiate flirting. This will not always happen candidly. Be on the lookout for eye contact and a smile.
- Don’t be afraid to make the initial flirt with someone.
2
Seek out someone in your league. Guys and girls are typically attracted to those who are in their league. When people date out of their league, relationships typically suffer because of jealousy or lack of interest.^{[14]
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Research source} Take a moment to look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself how attractive am I? This could be hard for some and most people need help if they don’t understand what “league” they fall into. Your physical appearance doesn’t take into account everything.
- Your attractiveness also depends upon your personality (including your humor), your dance moves, your hobbies, your friends, your family life, and more.
- There are successful relationships where members of the couple are out of each other's league. Take this with a grain of salt and know that keeping this in mind will simply make things a little easier for you.
- In general, if you feel a connection with someone, you probably have a shot. You are also probably in the same “league” if you feel some type of chemistry. Just go for it!
3
Never shy from an opportunity. Never limit yourself to where you should try to attract someone. You never know when the magic spark will light up. There is still a chance even if you’re working late and on the subway at night. Never shy away from an opportunity to attract a woman.
- Flirting in an unusual place like a subway or waiting room shows confidence. You never know until you try it.
- Don’t come off as too strong. It is important to seize the moment, but do it in a way where the girl doesn’t feel uncomfortable.
- Employ active listening when talking to someone. This will give you more of an opportunity and show her you care. Listen to obtain information, to understand her, for enjoyment, and to learn.^{[15]
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Expert Q&A

Question

What do girls find attractive?

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach
Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence building, advanced social skills, and relationships. Conquer and Win helps men worldwide have the love lives they deserve. His work has been featured in The Art of Manliness, LifeHack, and POF among others.

Eddy Baller

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

A confident person who feels at ease is attractive. Instead of staying home or going out with your guy friends, go out to places where you'll meet new people. Push yourself to start conversations everywhere you go, especially with women. Then, when you meet a woman you really like, talking to her will seem less intimidating and more natural.