How to Deal With Someone Who Is Always Mean to You

People can be just plain mean, and the only thing you can do for the better is take action. This article will offer some helpful tips on doing so.

Steps

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    When someone is mean to you, think of the saying, "Treat others the way you want to be treated".[1] You need to understand that everyone acts differently. Continue to be nice to them, even if they get on your nerves.[2]
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    If it doesn't work, practice a small lecture, and when you're ready, tell them. Keep a serious, but sweet face. Be honest about your feelings, and tell him/her that you felt hurt from the way they acted.[3]
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    If that person continues being mean, give them a more serious lecture for them to understand what they've been doing. Try to get them to understand that they don't accomplish anything by being mean.[4]
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    If still nothing has changed, tell a trusted adult, like a parent or even a teacher.[5]
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    If you finally get the person to change, make sure it's a type of change that can be practiced forward. If it's only a short amount of time or just a certain amount of time, that's when you just need to get serious.
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    Practice a long conversation with your friend, making your friend only pretend to be the mean person. Make sure you have a strict and a disgusted face while you're talking, but mostly strict and serious.
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    When you're ready, stand up to that person, and tell them what you've been wanting to say all this time. Don't be afraid. You'll be amazed what a simple conversation can do.[6]
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    If they've gotten nicer, and forever, just be friends with them so then they feel like they really changed. And get other people to be friends with the new and nicer person!
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Community Q&A

  • Question
    What should I do if they don't change and ignore me?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    If this person doesn't change, then you need to tell them in a stern but serious tone that you don't appreciate their attitude, and that they need to just leave you alone if all they're going to do is be negative. If this person has started ignoring you, then you should leave the situation alone. They're not bothering you or being mean to you anymore.
  • Question
    What do I do if I get in trouble for being mean back to the bully?
    Mo.mow.mo.money
    Mo.mow.mo.money
    Community Answer
    Just don't be mean back. Tell them in a firm way that their actions are unacceptable, and if they don't listen, tell a teacher.
  • Question
    What if she dragged my friend into being mean too?
    Tamara Najjar
    Tamara Najjar
    Community Answer
    Then that person wasn't really your friend.
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Warnings

  • You can get in trouble, because that certain person may be a very sensitive person, you just didn't know. It's a big risk, but do it just to get it over with anyway!
    ⧼thumbs_response⧽
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References

  1. ↑ https://zenhabits.net/18-practical-tips-for-living-the-golden-rule/
  2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201512/4-ways-deal-people-who-just-aren-t-very-nice
  3. ↑ https://www.thelist.com/77492/nice-ways-deal-mean-people/
  4. ↑ https://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-deal-with-negative-people-or-difficult-people/
  5. ↑ https://hbr.org/2014/10/how-to-deal-with-a-mean-colleague
  6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201209/how-and-how-not-stand-yourself
  7. ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/8-things-kids-can-say-or-do-to-stop-bullying_b_5a4ad6ffe4b0d86c803c7905
  8. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_deal_with_mean_people

About This Article

wikiHow is a “wiki,” similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. To create this article, 23 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. This article has been viewed 107,033 times.
352 votes - 62%
Co-authors: 23
Updated: July 8, 2020
Views: 107,033
Categories: Handling Friendship Problems
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