Do you want to ignore a guy that you like in order to make him like you more? Or do you need to ignore someone that you no longer want to be with (even if you still like him)? Fortunately, by following some simple tips and using a bit of discipline, you can successfully ignore the guy you like and either snag him or let him go for good.

Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Attracting Him by Ignoring Him

  1. 1
    Wait to text him back. When you get a text from a guy you like, it is very exciting. You will want to write him back right away. But not so fast! If you make him wait, he’s more likely to chase you.[1]
    • Wait anywhere from one hour (if it is a direct and specific question) to one day (if it just a casual "hello") before responding to a text.
    • You may want to set a timer or a reminder for yourself.
  2. 2
    Don’t initiate conversation. When you’re thinking about a special guy, anything can remind you of him. You may be compelled to reach out to him, to mention a song you heard or invite him to do something fun. But instead of initiating conversation with him, wait for him to contact you.[2]
    • You may want to write down things that you want to say to him.
    • This way, when he initiates conversation, you have a few interesting comments to use.
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  3. 3
    Flirt with other people. If you are out at a party with a guy that you like, go ahead and flirt with other people. Let the guy you like see you dance with another guy, or put your hand on someone’s shoulder. Let him see you laughing and having fun. This will make him want you more.[3]
    • Go up to a friend at a party and say something funny.
    • Find extra reasons to stand close to someone, or find reasons to touch them.
  4. 4
    Let him know that you’re busy. You will seem more attractive to him if he sees that you don’t need him to stay busy. Find fun ways to spend your time, such as making plans with friends or joining a club, and keep your schedule full. Make him work around your schedule if he wants to spend time with you.[4]
    • If he calls you and wants to go out on Friday night, say “I’d love to, but I have plans that day. Can we do Saturday instead?”
  5. 5
    Give him space. When your guy would rather play basketball with his friends than go see a movie with you, don’t let it bother you one bit. Just shrug it off and do something with your friends instead. When he notices that you are giving him plenty of space, he will be drawn to you.[5]
    • People need space and alone time for various reasons. For example, they may be the only child in the family or come from a large family and need some alone time.
    • Both the partners should give due respect to it.[6]
    • But they should ask for it appropriately.[7] For example, instead of saying please give me space, they can say I like you and am enjoying your company, but I have gotten used to alone time, and I know that I need that to be the best of myself.
    • If he makes plans with someone else and you feel upset, choose one person to talk about it with (someone who you trust) and then let it go.
    • Make sure he is not blowing you off or ditching you. If you had plans together first and he changes them (and if this happens more than once), it may be time to ignore him for good.
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Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Ignoring Him in More Subtle Ways

  1. 1
    Wait a few days to respond to a request. If you want to make your attempts to ignore your guy a little subtler, one great option is to wait a few days to agree to hang out. If he wants to go meet up outside of school, you can let him know that you are interested, but that you need to figure out when you're available.
    • When he asks you to hang out, let him know that you have to get back to him.
    • Wait anywhere from one to three days to confirm.
  2. 2
    Make him work around your schedule. If the guy you like wants to spend time with you, make him work around your schedule. Don’t change your life to accommodate him. This is an excellent way to play hard to get and ignore your guy in a subtle way.[8]
    • In order for this to work, you've got to stay busy.
    • Fill your time with regular activities, such as a weekly date to do your nails with your friends or weekly trips to the bookstore to look at new books.
  3. 3
    Make him jealous. Another effective way to ignore your guy is to pay some attention to somebody else. Making your guy a little bit jealous can be an excellent way to remind him how much he values you, and push him to give you the attention you deserve.[9]
    • You can make him jealous by texting or writing notes to someone else.
    • Another method is just to let him see you talking and having fun with others.
    • Be careful not to take this too far. You only want to make him a little bit jealous, not drive him away.
  4. 4
    Drop hints that you might want out of the relationship. If you are already going out with this guy, but he isn’t treating you the way you would like, you may want to drop some hints that you’re looking for the door. If he really cares about you, he will step up and make sure you stay.[10]
    • Talk about your plans for the summer (as if they do not include him).
    • Perhaps you are thinking about going away to a summer camp, or on a long road trip with family.
    • When you talk about the future (like where you will attend high school or college), try dropping a line like, “Well, we don’t really know what is going to happen with us.”
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Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Getting Over Him

  1. 1
    Let him know that it's over. If you have decided that this relationship is over for good, make sure that he knows it too. Speak to him in person (not over the phone) and be as clear as you can. Don't make him think you are just taking a break, or that he should wait for you.
    • You may say, "We are not working out. I am moving on."
    • You may say, "This relationship has run its course. I am ready to try something new."
  2. 2
    Delete him from your phone. If you are trying to get over a guy (even if you still have feelings for him), you simply must ignore him. Begin by deleting him from your phone. If you cannot call or text him with the push of a button, you are less likely to reach out.[11]
    • If you want to write his number down somewhere, then go ahead.
    • But if you reach for your phone and want to call or text him, you will have to find the number and enter it in manually.
    • This extra step should be enough to stop the cycle and get you to set the phone down.
  3. 3
    Ignore him on social media. If you want to get over a guy, you need to avoid seeing him, and this includes seeing him through the internet. You will need to completely ignore him on social media. If you do not want to "unfriend" him, then at the very least, you must "hide" or "unfollow" him. This will allow you the space you need to heal.
  4. 4
    Do not try to fix things. When you are heartbroken, you are likely to imagine all the ways you could have done things differently. Chances are, you’ll be tempted to phone your ex and sort everything out. But if you’ve already decided to ignore this guy, don’t worry about fixing what has been done. Remember that it is not your job to fix things or make him feel better. Your only job is to take care of you.[12]
    • If you really need to sort things out, do it by writing things down.
    • You may also want to talk things over with a close friend.
  5. 5
    Do not wish him well on holidays. On his birthday, Christmas, the New Year, or any other holiday, you may be tempted to text him to wish him well. Don’t do this. You will just be opening a door that is better left shut.[13]
    • Text somebody else to wish them a happy holiday and then set the phone down.
  6. 6
    Keep yourself busy. The best way to ignore your ex is to keep yourself busy. Maybe this means going on a date with somebody else, maybe this means spending quality time with your friends, or maybe this means staying home and watching movies with a pizza. Whatever you do, just stay busy and ignoring your ex will be a snap.[14]
  7. 7
    Take some space from mutual friends. If you and your ex shared a lot of mutual friends, you may need to take some time away from the whole group. Perhaps there are some new people at school you could spend some time with instead. By taking time away from your group of friends, you avoid running into your ex and make it easier to ignore him.
    • This may mean missing out on parties or other fun events, but it is only temporary, and it will be worth it.
    • This may even open you up to new friendship opportunities.
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Community Q&A

  • Question
    How can I ignore a friend?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Many of these same tips will work for ignoring a friend.
  • Question
    I have a friend who is in love with me. I don't want to be with him, but would like to preserve our friendship. What should I do?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Explain to him the way you feel and then give him some space. After a period of time, you may be able to be friends again.
  • Question
    How can I tell someone indirectly that I am not interested in them?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Ignore them completely.
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About This Article

Patti Novak Williams
Co-authored by:
Professional Matchmaker & Dating Coach
This article was co-authored by Patti Novak Williams. Patti Novak Williams is a Professional Matchmaker in Las Vegas, Nevada. With over 20 years of experience, Patti specializes in working with clients one on one to help them find love. She has helped match hundreds of couples, engagements, and marriages. Patti was the star of the critically acclaimed A&E series “Confessions of a Matchmaker.” She has been featured in the New York Times, the New York Daily News, the New York Post, and The Wall Street Journal, and has appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show, TODAY with Hoda and Kathy Lee, The Rachael Ray Show, CBS’ The Early Show, CNN, The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch, The Nate Berkus Show, and Fox’s The Morning Show With Mike & Juliet. Patti published a book in 2008 with Random House titled “Get Over Yourself!: How to Get Real, Get Serious, and Get Ready to Find True Love.” This article has been viewed 455,269 times.
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Co-authors: 27
Updated: October 3, 2022
Views: 455,269
Article SummaryX

To attract a guy you like by ignoring him, wait at least an hour before you reply to his text message to leave him wondering what you’re up to. When you want to tell him something, don’t reach out to him, since this might make you seem too eager. Instead, write down the thought you had so you can bring it up casually later when he comes to you. You will seem more attractive if he sees that you don’t need him to stay busy, so keep your schedule full and make him work around you. For tips on ignoring him in more subtle ways, like how to make him jealous, keep reading!

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