How to Impress Your Boyfriend's Parents

Co-authored by Erika Kaplan

Last Updated: November 5, 2022 References Approved

You really like your boyfriend, and you want his parents to like you too. This usually signals a big step in your relationship. You may feel nervous and excited at the same time, but with a little planning, you can still make a good impression.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Dressing to Impress

1
Be on the conservative side. Avoid wearing anything that shows too much skin, shows your tattoos, or is too tight. You want to look classic, polished, and well put together. Looking sexy may work for a date night with your boyfriend, but it will not impress his parents.
- Also dress for the occasion. You wouldn't wear stilettos or dress shoes to a lunch in the park or a family BBQ.^{[1]
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- Avoid wearing clothing with language or images that may be offensive.
2
Get your boyfriend's opinion about your outfit. Your boyfriend knows his parents better than you do and can help you choose an outfit.^{[2]
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Research source} Put together a few outfits that show your personal style, but are also parent friendly. Some sample outfits you may consider include:
- If you are going somewhere casual, jeans or pants with a blouse works well. Your pants or jeans should not be too tight. You can also add a blazer or a jacket to your outfit as well.
- If you need something a little dressier, a simple dress with a modest hemline works. Choose a dress that hits right above your knee or longer.
- A skirt and a top are also an option. Again, the skirt should not be too short. You should be able to sit down comfortably.
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3
Wear something you feel good in. Choose an outfit that makes you feel confident. Your clothing should not be a distraction to you or his parents. When you are confident in your looks, you can focus on spending time with him and getting to know his parents.^{[3]
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- For example, you do not want to sit through dinner and constantly wonder if your bra strap is showing.
- If you have any doubts about an item of clothing, go with something else.
4
Use minimal makeup and accessories. If you wear make up, go for a natural look. Skip the bold lip colors or dramatic eye makeup. ^{[4]
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Research source} Jewelry is fine, but stick to simple items like studs instead of large hoops.
- Your jewelry and makeup should not be a distraction.^{[5]
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- If you want to wear a larger piece of jewelry such as a statement necklace, keep the rest of your jewelry to a minimum.
- If you are wearing nail polish, make sure that it is neat and not chipped.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Making a Good First Impression

1
Do some research on his parents. Ask your boyfriend some questions about his parents. What is their sense of humor like? Are there any topics that are off limits? What books, movies, or television shows do they like? What are their hobbies?^{[6]
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- Think of some questions you can ask based on your research. This will help the conversation flow and show that you are really interested in getting to know them.
2
Bring a gift. Don't show up to the meeting empty handed. A gift says that you appreciate being invited and that you are serious about their son. It also shows that you are a thoughtful person.^{[7]
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Research source} The gift does not need to be large or expensive. Good gifts include:^{[8]
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- Fresh flowers in a small vase
- A bottle of wine (if you are old enough)
- A box of chocolates
- A thank-you card
3
Greet his parents with a smile. When you meet his parents, smile and address them as Mr. and Mrs. Do not call his parents by their first name unless you are instructed to do so. This shows that you are respectful and have good manners.^{[10]
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Expert Source

Erika Kaplan
Relationship Advisor
Expert Interview. 1 October 2020.}
- Give his parents a hug or a handshake when you meet them. Follow his parents' lead during the greeting. If they extend their arms, go in for a hug.
- Always show up on time. If you are running late, call and let them know.
4
Be polite. Practice good manners when you are around his parents. Say "please" and "thank you." Do not interrupt when someone else is talking. Give genuine compliments.^{[11]
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Expert Source

Erika Kaplan
Relationship Advisor
Expert Interview. 1 October 2020.} If you like the food that was prepared or his mom's earrings, say so.^{[12]
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- Do not compliment just to flatter his parents and get on their good side. You do not want to be fake.
- Let his parents know that you are happy to meet them and you appreciate their time/hospitality/kindness. Thank them for having you in their house, cooking you dinner, etc.^{[13]
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- You may say, "Thanks for everything. It was great meeting you. I hope to see you soon!"

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Interacting with His Parents

1
Ask questions. His parents will ask you questions because they are trying to get to know you. However, the conversation should not be all about you. You need to show them that you are interested in them. If you did your homework, you should already have some questions that you can ask.^{[14]
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- For example, if you know his mother loves gardening, ask her about her plans for the next planting season. You may say, "___ told me that you love gardening, what do you plan to plant next season?"
- You can also ask them about their profession. You may say, "Mr. ___, ___ said that you are a dentist. How did you become interested in that?"
2
Offer your help. If you are having dinner at his home, offer to help wash the dishes or clear the table. Ask if there is anything that you can do. This shows that you are humble^{[15]
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Research source} and a team player.^{[16]
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Research source} This may also give you some one-on-one time with one of his parents as well.
- You can simply say, "Mrs. ___, let me help you with those dishes." You could also say, "Do you need any help in the kitchen?"
- Have a positive attitude when you help. If you hate washing dishes, your boyfriend's parents do not need to know that.
- Never complain or whine in front of his parents.
3
Be yourself. Your boyfriend likes you for the person you are and is excited for you to meet his parents. Show his parents the same person that he fell for. If you try too hard to impress his parents, they will see right through you. You want to come across as a genuine person.^{[17]
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- If they are talking about something that you don't know about, listen and ask some questions instead of pretending like you are familiar with the topic.
- Be honest when you talk to them. If your grades aren't that good and they ask you how school is going, you may say, "I didn't do well last grading period, but I'm working really hard now," instead of lying and saying that you are a straight A student.
4
Avoid controversial topics. Try not bring up things such as politics and religion. These topics are very personal and can lead to heated discussions. It is easier to steer clear and not worry about offending anyone or becoming offended.
- If any of these topics come up, do more listening instead of talking. Wait until you know his family better before you discuss these topics.
- Also stay out of any family feuds or issues that are brought up.^{[18]
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  Research source} Do not choose a side and remain quiet.
5
Let them know how much you enjoy their son. Do not forget about your boyfriend while you are trying to impress his parents. His parents are interested in seeing how the two of you interact as well. Compliment him and laugh at his jokes.^{[19]
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Expert Source

Erika Kaplan
Relationship Advisor
Expert Interview. 1 October 2020.}
- You could say, "I have really enjoyed meeting you guys. I can see where ___ gets his manners/sense of humor from."
- Do not criticize him in front of his parents. Even if you tease him as a joke, his parents might not find it funny.
- Don't be too touchy-feely in front of his parents. His parents do not want to see that.^{[20]
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  Research source} Some hand-holding may be fine, but talk to your boyfriend about this before the meeting.

Conversation Help

Making a Great First Impression on Your Boyfriend's Parents

Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend's Parents

Topics to Avoid Initially Discussing with Your Boyfriend's Parents

Community Q&A

Question

What questions should you ask your boyfriend's parents?

Community Answer

Ask his parents about their jobs, hobbies, and what they like to do for fun. Before you meet them, ask your boyfriend for some background information on his parents. You can then do a little research and come up with some questions based on his parents' interests.
Question

What if his parents have a problem with caste or age?

Community Answer

Try to be as polite and kind as possible when you meet them. You cannot control if they have a problem with your caste or age. They may come to like you after they get to know you a little better. Address your concerns with your boyfriend before you meet his parents. Remember that your boyfriend likes you even if his parents don't.
Question

What if you are very awkward?

Community Answer

If you are awkward, embrace who you are. Remember that your boyfriend likes you for who you are, and his parents probably will as well. Be yourself and wear something that you feel confident in.