How to Text Like You Don't Care

Co-authored by Cher Gopman and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: February 21, 2022

Acting like you don’t care anymore is a great way to get your crush, your ex, or someone you like to come crawling back for more. Plus, playing hard to get can pique someone’s interest in you and get them excited about your relationship. In this article, we’ll tell you the top 11 tips to sound super cool and casual every time you send someone a text message.

1

Let the other person text you first.

Sending the first text automatically shows a little bit of interest. If your goal is to act like you don’t care, hold off and let them send the first message. That way, you’re only talking to them because they started the conversation, not necessarily because you wanted to.^{[1]
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- It can be tough to wait around for someone you like to text you first. Try distracting yourself by hanging out with friends or doing a fun hobby in the meantime.

2

Wait a while before responding.

Take a few hours to respond to show that you’re busy. Texting back right away can make it seem like you were waiting by the phone for their message. When they do text you, try to hold off for a little bit before sending a response. Chances are, they’ll wonder what you were doing or who you were with that held you up for so long.^{[2]
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- When you reply late, don’t mention it or apologize. This will show the person you’re texting that you don’t care enough to keep track of the time.

3

Reply with one word.

Keep your texts short and sweet to show you can’t be bothered. Long, drawn out messages tell the other person that you spent some time crafting the perfect message. Instead, go for simple replies that only take a few seconds to type out. Try things like:^{[3]
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- “Ok”
- “Yeah”
- “Sure”
- “Nice”

4

Send one text at a time.

Double or triple texting can be a little overbearing. To keep things cool and casual, only send one text at a time, even if you get left on read. Chances are, the person you’re texting will realize that you aren’t going to reach out again, and they’ll reply faster than they would if you double texted.
- Being left on read probably isn’t your fault—some people are just bad texters!

5

Don’t end your texts with a period.

Periods make your texts look extra serious. It sounds silly, but when you’re texting, lay off the periods and punctuation in general. That way, your texts come across as casual and aloof, rather than formal and grammatically correct.^{[4]
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- Try not to use emojis, either—they help lighten the mood, but they also take some time and effort to insert into your texts.

6

Talk about other people.

Tell the person you’re texting about how you just got asked out. If they’re a jealous person, this will probably put them on edge almost immediately. Try to bring it up casually so you aren’t forcing it into the conversation, but still let them know that other people like you. Try something like:
- “Omg sorry it took me so long to reply, I was on the phone with this guy who gave me his number yesterday.”
- “I can’t text for long—I’ve got a date tonight.”

7

Tell them you’re busy.

Let them know that you don’t have time for texting right now. You don’t have to give a ton of details, but by telling the person you’re texting that you’re busy, they’re sure to wonder where you’re going (and who you’re going with). End a conversation by saying something like:^{[5]
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- “I gotta go. I’m heading out on the town tonight. Talk to you later!”
- “Hey, I don’t have a ton of time to chat. I have plans tonight.”

8

Don’t berate them if they take a while to respond.

Showing that you care about their response times is a no-no. If you want your person to think that you could take them or leave them, try not to show that you’re angry when they take hours (or days) to reply back to you. Simply don’t mention it at all—that way, they think you haven’t even noticed.
- A good way to act super cool is to match their response times. If they takes a day and a half to text back, try waiting for 2 days.

9

Ignore the texts all together.

Send a clear message that you can’t be bothered to respond. If the person you’re talking to has really made you mad, you might want to ignore them all together. Just keep in mind, though, that ignoring someone for too long could make them think that you aren’t interested at all.^{[6]
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- Try ignoring the texts for a couple of days. If they don’t reach out again in that time, you can respond back to keep their interest.

10

Don’t answer late-night texts.

Signal to the other person that you won’t stay up late for them. If you get a text at an hour that you might be sleeping (even if you aren’t), just ignore it for now. You can answer it in the morning if you want, but don’t apologize for replying late.
- Late-night messages sometimes mean the other person is asking for a booty call. If you want to show that you don’t care, you definitely shouldn’t respond to any “You up?” messages.

11

Text in front of them.

Show the person that you don’t care when you’re in-person together. Normally, it’s pretty rude to whip out your phone when you’re hanging out with someone else. However, if it’s your goal to make the person you like feel a little awkward, get out your phone and start texting someone else when you two are hanging out.
- If they ask who you’re texting, say something like, “No one,” or, “You don’t know them.”