This article was co-authored by Susan Pazak, PhD. Dr. Susan Pazak is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. With more than 21 years of experience, she specializes in treating adolescents and adults with psychological issues using cognitive behavioral therapy, symptom reduction skills, and behavior modification techniques. She has been featured in numerous media outlets and shows, including “My Strange Addiction". Dr. Pazak holds a BA in Psychology with a minor in Communications from The University of Pittsburgh, an MA in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University, and a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Alliant International University.
There are 15 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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With all the best intentions in the world, there will probably be at least a few people whom you don't particularly want crossing your path. Whatever the reason, disliking someone is a subjective response and it is always a good idea to do your best to be respectful. Depending on the situation, there are different things to consider — whether it is a professional or social setting, for example — in order to help you determine if you should avoid someone or respectfully confront them. Keeping things respectful avoids drama and shows that even through dislike, you can still maintain dignity.
Steps
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do you politely avoid someone?Julia Yacoob, PhDDr. Julia Yacoob is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist practicing in New York City. She specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for adults coping with a variety of symptoms and life stressors. Dr. Yacoob earned an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Rutgers University, and pursued specialized training at Weill Cornell Medical College, New York Presbyterian Hospital, Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the Institute for Behavior Therapy, and Bellevue Hospital Cancer Center. Dr. Yacoob is a member of the American Psychological Association, Women’s Mental Health Consortium, NYC Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Association, and Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies.
Clinical PsychologistThat depends on the situation, obviously. If someone is bothering you, you can simply move and ignore the person in question. If that's not possible, assert yourself, but try to avoid building tension. -
QuestionHow do you tell a coworker they are annoying?Julia Yacoob, PhDDr. Julia Yacoob is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist practicing in New York City. She specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for adults coping with a variety of symptoms and life stressors. Dr. Yacoob earned an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Rutgers University, and pursued specialized training at Weill Cornell Medical College, New York Presbyterian Hospital, Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the Institute for Behavior Therapy, and Bellevue Hospital Cancer Center. Dr. Yacoob is a member of the American Psychological Association, Women’s Mental Health Consortium, NYC Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Association, and Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies.
Clinical PsychologistJust be straight with the person. Try to talk about the situation with a friend or a spouse to roleplay the talk, as this will surely help you feel prepared.
References
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2013/08/how-to-manage-someone-you-dont
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. 22 February 2022.
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/ambigamy/201212/how-be-disrespectful-respectfully
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ http://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/stress-management.htm
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. Friday, April 22, 2022.
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ https://www.apartmentratings.com/renters-library/dealing-with-a-nosy-neighbor.html
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. 22 April 2022.
- ↑ http://westsidetoastmasters.com/resources/book_of_body_language/chap9.html
- ↑ http://www.uwosh.edu/ccdet/caregiver/Documents/Gris/Handouts/gracasr.pdf
- ↑ http://op-talk.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/10/13/when-you-shouldnt-bring-a-friend/?_r=0
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-zesty-self/201109/four-steps-developing-patience
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-zesty-self/201109/four-steps-developing-patience
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-zesty-self/201109/four-steps-developing-patience
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. 22 April 2022.
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/5-tips-to-increase-your-assertiveness/
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/5-tips-to-increase-your-assertiveness/
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. 22 April 2022.
- ↑ Susan Pazak, PhD. Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. Expert Interview. 22 April 2022.
- ↑ https://www.themuse.com/advice/how-to-deal-with-a-coworker-you-dont-likebut-everyone-else-is-obsessed-with
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-way-to-build-and-preserve-better-boundaries/
About This Article
You can usually avoid someone you don’t like without making it obvious or offending them. Although you might not be able to avoid the person completely, you can keep your conversations as brief as possible and avoid going into detail. Then, excuse yourself as soon as possible. Just say something like, “Anyway, I must get back to work,” or “I’ll see you around then.” You can also act busy or talk to other people so the person will be less likely to start a conversation with you. If you face away from them and avoid eye contact, you’ll also avoid giving them invitations to talk to you. For more advice from our co-author, including how to avoid family members you don’t like, read on.