This article was co-authored by Klare Heston, LCSW. Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
There are 11 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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A girl’s first period can be a scary and embarrassing experience. This is especially true when she’s left unprepared or feels like it’s not something that she can talk about openly with her parents. To make sure your daughter sees her first period as a positive and natural part of life, celebrate the event! This celebration can be low-key or more involved. Make it part of a years-long conversation with your daughter about growing up, and fit the party to her personality.
Steps
Creating a Period Gift Box
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1Make a gift box for the celebration. Use an old basket or go to an arts and crafts store to find a small wooden box. Make sure whatever you choose is big enough to hold some goodies. Add embellishments to the box that reflect your daughter’s personality and favorite colors.[1]
- You can go for a quirky tone or something more elegant, depending on your daughter’s personality. Your daughter might be the type to make a joke about her first period, or you could have a girl who’s going to want a memorable keepsake to get teary over.
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2Put together a kit for her to take to school. In addition to a gift box, your daughter is going to want something to keep her essentials in when she’s at school. The kit should be something small that she can fit in her backpack, such as a pencil case. It should also be large enough to fit several pads and other essentials.[2]
- Don’t put the word “period” on it or buy something red. While you might find this cute or funny, your daughter probably won’t.
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3Fill the box and kit with the necessary supplies. The purpose of the box and kit is to make your daughter feel ready to handle any situation related to her period. Include all the obvious essentials. If there’s room, add other items that you feel are appropriate for your daughter’s unique needs.[3]
- All kits and boxes should have pads, wet wipes or tissues, hand sanitizer, and a cute pair of replacement underwear.
- Most girls won’t start out using tampons. If your daughter is a swimmer, she’s an exception.
- You might also want to add a little booklet of tips to the gift box. For example, you could write a note telling your daughter to keep an extra sweatshirt in her locker just in case she has a leakage emergency.
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4Add some fun items to make her smile. Enough with the serious stuff. This is supposed to be a celebration! Put some chocolate or your daughter’s favorite sweet snack in the gift box. Write a card telling her you love her, and that you’re always there for her.[4]
- Go for a sappy card if you’re creating an elegant keepsake. If you’re striving for a quirkier tone, keep the card light and cute.
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5Personalize the box or kit so it’s just from you. You can buy pre-made period kits online for your daughter. While these are great for getting ideas, it’ll mean more to your daughter if she knows you made her a box and kit all on your own.[5]
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6Add items to the kit she feels she needs. Once you’ve given your daughter her gifts, ask her what she thinks. There may be specific items she wants in the kit to prepare herself at school. Take her to your local pharmacy to finish making the kit together.[6]
Throwing a Period Party
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1Ask your daughter what she wants to do to celebrate. Get permission from your daughter before you start planning any events, and offer her some options so she can choose what would be best for her. Keep in mind that the whole point is to make your daughter feel positively about her period. Make any party plans together.[7]
- Don’t get upset if your daughter’s ideas for the party are super different from your own. It’s her party, and she should be the one who gets to control it.
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2Throw a party if your daughter is social and outgoing. Invite some of her friends over for a slumber party and keep things low-key but fun. Let the girls celebrate in their own way. Having these positive and supportive parties could become a new tradition among your daughter and her close friends![8]
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3Plan a one-on-one night if your daughter is private. Some girls may cringe at the thought of celebrating her period with her friends (or, even worse, your friends). If that’s the case, celebrate with just the two of you. This may mean more to some girls.[9]
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4Plan a period-friendly menu to make her feel better. There are lots of foods that can help your daughter through any tough symptoms that came along with her first period. Nuts, leafy greens, and foods that are high in iron or potassium are all great for keeping her healthy and happy during her cycle.[10]
- Set out a few bowls of sunflower seeds and walnuts. Drizzle them with a little honey to add some sweetness. Serve a big spinach salad and make a banana bread for dessert.[11]
- You can also ask your daughter if there are any foods that would satisfy her cravings. Chocolate brownies could be a big hit.
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5Get corny with the menu if your daughter wants a laugh. If a period-themed menu appeals to your daughter’s sense of humor, get a little silly with the food and drinks. Plan a menu that celebrates your daughter’s period by choosing red foods and drinks, or dishes that symbolize fertility.[12]
- A sample menu could include mini-quiches (which have lots of eggs in them), spaghetti and red sauce, and red velvet cupcakes. You can also serve cranberry juice or even sparkling pink lemonade. If it’s winter, go for the egg nog!
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6Set up a massage train to ease cramps. If you’ve planned a slumber party for several girls, they’re not going to want to rub each other’s bellies. But giving each other a nice shoulder and neck rub relaxes tense muscles, and this, too, can help with menstrual cramps.[13]
- If it’s just you and your daughter, you can talk about other ways to ease cramps. This could include showing her how to lightly rub her lower belly, or giving her a heating pad.
Making Your Daughter Comfortable
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1Spread out talks about puberty over multiple years. Begin talking about your daughter’s body as soon as she has questions. This will likely be as soon as she can talk. Have age-appropriate talks spaced out over your daughter’s life, instead of one, big “Period Talk.”[14]
- You can talk to very young children about their body parts, and what various things are for. Provide more details as she gets older, always checking to make sure your daughter understands the information you’re giving her.
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2Be prepared with the right supplies. Most girls get their period when they’re about 12 or 13, although some girls could get their period when they’re 9 or 10. Once your daughter hits these years, stock up on items for her kit. You don’t want to make a panicked, late-night pharmacy run with your daughter crying in the backseat.[15]
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3Talk about periods as positive experiences. Avoid calling your period “the Curse,” or anything similarly terrifying. Your daughter should understand that this is something women experience naturally as they grow up. It’s an exciting sign that she’s growing up.[16]
- Tell your daughter this definitely isn’t something she should be embarrassed about. Explain that all women and girls get their periods. In fact, because periods are part of becoming a mother, the survival of the human race depends on them![17]
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4Answer your daughter’s questions directly and honestly. Your daughter will probably have lots of questions for you. Some you’ll know the answers for, and some you won’t. Keep up a comfortable and open tone during this chat, and make sure your daughter knows that no question is a bad one.[18]
- Common questions might include, “Why am I the first one of my friends to get my period,” “Can I still go swimming,” “How long does it last,” “Why does it happen,” or “Am I normal?”
- Tell your daughter when she’s asked a question you don’t have an answer for. Use this as a chance to look for good, reliable answers together. You can go online, search in a book, or call your daughter’s doctor.
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5Read a book or watch a video together. Don’t just hand your daughter a book or a link to a video and think you’re done. She might not read or watch whatever you give her, and then you’re leaving her totally unprepared. Explore this stuff together and make it part of an experience that you share with one another.[19]
- Some good options for books include Lynda Madaras’s What’s Happening to My Body? and My Body, My Self for Girls by the same author. American Girl also has a line of books called The Care and Keeping of You with good information.
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6Reassure your daughter with personal stories. Your daughter might want to hear all about your embarrassing period stories, as this could make her laugh and feel more comfortable. She may also think this is weird, so let her tell you what she needs from you.[20]
- Not all parents have had periods, and that’s ok! If your daughter wants to talk to someone who’s had a period, and that person isn’t you, put her in touch with a friend, family member, or doctor. By doing this, you’re still giving your daughter the support she needs, and she’ll know it came from you.
References
- ↑ http://thestir.cafemom.com/tweens_teens/158219/6_ways_to_make_your
- ↑ https://sexedrescue.com/2016/diy-period-kit-for-school/
- ↑ https://sexedrescue.com/2016/diy-period-kit-for-school/
- ↑ https://sexedrescue.com/2016/diy-period-kit-for-school/
- ↑ https://sexedrescue.com/2016/diy-period-kit-for-school/
- ↑ https://sexedrescue.com/2016/diy-period-kit-for-school/
- ↑ http://www.metroparent.com/daily/parenting/oh-mother/period-parties-girls-thrown-parents/
- ↑ http://www.epigee.org/menstruation-menarche-daughters-first-period.html
- ↑ http://www.epigee.org/menstruation-menarche-daughters-first-period.html
- ↑ http://www.zliving.com/wellness/prevention-healing/5-foods-women-should-eat-during-their-periods
- ↑ http://www.healwithfood.org/menstrualcramps/foods.php
- ↑ http://www.epigee.org/menstruation-menarche-daughters-first-period.html
- ↑ http://www.epigee.org/menstruation-menarche-daughters-first-period.html
- ↑ http://kidshealth.org/en/parents/talk-about-menstruation.html#
- ↑ https://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/10/29/what-to-do-when-your-daughter-gets-her-period-too-young-or-right-on-time/
- ↑ http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/parenting/tweens-teens/preparing-for-your-daughter%E2%80%99s-first-period
- ↑ http://kidshealth.org/en/parents/talk-about-menstruation.html#
- ↑ http://teens.webmd.com/girls-puberty-10/girls-first-period?page=2
- ↑ http://teens.webmd.com/girls-puberty-10/girls-first-period?page=2
- ↑ http://teens.webmd.com/girls-puberty-10/girls-first-period?page=4
About This Article
Some parents want to celebrate their daughter’s new stage of life when she gets her first period, and either a period gift box or a party are good ways to do so. If your daughter is shy about getting her period, giving her a gift box to celebrate without making a fuss. Choose an old basket or a small wooden box to hold all of the supplies. Then fill the container with menstrual products, extra underwear, hand sanitizer, and any other items your daughter may need. You can also add fun items to the box, such as her favorite chocolate or candy. If your daughter is excited about getting her period and wants to enjoy the moment with her friends, throw her a party to celebrate. Serve foods at the party that can help to ease menstrual symptoms such as nuts, chocolate, and bananas. If your daughter likes a laugh, you can instead create a period-themed menu for the party and include things like cranberry juice and red velvet cupcakes. For more ideas on celebrating your daughter’s first period, like how to help her feel comfortable with this change, read on.