How to Cut Yourself off from Society

Co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS

Last Updated: April 25, 2022 References

Cutting yourself off from society involves being sure about your reasons to do so. You will need to eliminate contact with other people, even loved ones, and stop using the services provided by contemporary society. Cutting yourself off from society is a drastic move, and not to be taken lightly. Think carefully if this action will accomplish what you hope it will accomplish. Then start dropping out of communications and social events, and start relying solely on yourself.

Part 1

Part 1 of 7:

Examining Your Reasons

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Decide if political or environmental reasons are motivating you. Some people want to cut themselves off from society for political or environmental reasons. They want to live off the grid, for instance. Living off the grid is a way to cut yourself off from society. This way, you are not dependent on the municipal and social services many of us simply take for granted, such as water, electricity, cell phone service and garbage removal.
- Most people living off the grid are also concerned with consumerism and the idea that modern society used too much of the earth’s natural resources.^{[1]
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Determine if you have depression or anxiety. Some people want to leave society because they are suffering from depression or social anxiety disorder.^{[2]
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Trustworthy Source
Mayo Clinic
Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals
Go to source} Depression or feelings of loneliness can cause people to isolate themselves from others.
- Research has shown that social isolation can be dangerous to your health, as it impairs immune function and increases inflammation. These symptoms are precursors to diabetes and heart disease.^{[3]
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- If you think your reasons for wanting to cut yourself off from society are due to your own feelings of sadness or loneliness, consider seeing your doctor or a mental health professional.
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3
Ask yourself if you’re avoiding the law. Another reason people cut themselves off from society is to avoid the law. ^{[4]
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Ahearn, F. & Horan, E. (2010). How to disappear, erase your digital footprint, leave false trails & vanish without a trace. Lyons Press.} It’s not recommended that you run from the police. If you have committed a crime or if there is a warrant for your arrest, turn yourself in to your local police station.^{[5]
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- If you think you’ve been wrongly accused, hire a lawyer and fight the charge. You will likely still need to report to the police.
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Assess whether you want to avoid the grind of daily life. People may choose to cut themselves off from society for less strenuous reasons, such as simply wishing to avoid the grind of daily life. Working from home is certainly more possible these days than in the past.
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Know that humans are social beings. As you determine your reasons for cutting yourself off from society, it’s important to understand that humans are naturally social. We benefit, both physically and psychologically, from being in relation or in connection with each other.^{[6]
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Jordan, J. (1991). The meaning of mutuality. In Jordan, J., Kaplan, A., Baker, J., Stiver, I., & Surrey, J. (Eds.) Women’s growth in connection: Writings from the Stone Center (pp. 51-66). New York, NY: Guilford Press.}

Part 2

Part 2 of 7:

Identifying Your Boundaries

1
Determine to what level you wish to cut yourself off from society. Do you want to stay away from family, friends, business associates, or all of these? If you have a profession or job that takes you outside of your home, cutting yourself entirely from society will be quite difficult. By nature of it, you will be required at the very least, to interact with those you work with.
2
Determine your limits. If you cut yourself off from society, will you make any exceptions? Who will you allow yourself to communicate and interact with? Think about the types of circumstances that would warrant getting back in touch with society.
3
Think about how long you’ll be away from society. If things are tough right now, it can seem like a good idea to cut yourself off from society. But think about how this will play out over the long haul. Do you want to stay away for a week, a month, or longer?
- Your time frame will determine your actions. For example, if you want to cut yourself off for a year, think about moving somewhere remote.

Part 3

Part 3 of 7:

Ceasing Communications

1
Get rid of your phone. Current technology, such as cell phones and computers can automatically track a user’s whereabouts without the user even realizing it. If you want to disconnect your mobile phone, you may need to contact the carrier (AT&T, Verizon, Sprint, etc.) and tell them to disable your service.
- Many carriers require their users to sign a contract for coverage. Breaking this contract before the agreed coverage date has been reached may involve paying a fee. ^{[7]
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  Ahearn, F. & Horan, E. (2010). How to disappear, erase your digital footprint, leave false trails & vanish without a trace. Lyons Press.}
2
Remove yourself from social media. Close down all accounts that you have on social media platforms. This includes Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, and all other programs and applications that encourage social exchange between people.^{[8]
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Ahearn, F. & Horan, E. (2010). How to disappear, erase your digital footprint, leave false trails & vanish without a trace. Lyons Press.}
3
Disable your email accounts. Most email service providers have a link to email settings with an option to deactivate the account. This prevents additional email from piling up in an account that you are no longer using. If you think you might eventually use the account again, you can simply log out and not log back in. Keep in mind, though, that incoming email will continue to be stored in your account. ^{[9]
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Ahearn, F. & Horan, E. (2010). How to disappear, erase your digital footprint, leave false trails & vanish without a trace. Lyons Press.}
4
Consider cutting off your internet. When you use the internet, you send and receive information through an internet protocol (IP) address. This IP is linked to your router. Your online movements can still be tracked through this information. If you want to cut yourself off from society, think about how your online actions might allow others to find you.^{[10]
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5
Stop watching television or reading the newspaper. Don’t bother staying up-to-date on the latest news or TV shows. If you want to truly be removed from society, stop following what happens.
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Avoid speaking or communicating to anyone at all. Keep communication with others to the barest minimum. This involves any kind of social exchange, including speaking, email, texting or sign language.
- If you frequent a business, such as a shop or a restaurant, ask for what you need and nothing more. Do not make small talk with the shopkeeper or waitperson. Do not engage in conversation with others while waiting for the bus.

Part 4

Part 4 of 7:

Ending Relationships

1
Halt contact with people you see regularly. Normally, people have contact with various individuals throughout their day, whether these are work colleagues, coffee shop employees, postal workers, or passing neighbors. In order to cut yourself off, stop talking with these various people.
- Stop answering the phone or opening your door to callers.
- Complete isolation may be difficult if you still need to go to work and communicate with co-workers and supervisors.
- This will be somewhat easier if you live alone. You can use your home as a sanctuary where you can isolate yourself.
2
Stop hanging out with your friends. Remove yourself from your friends’ lives by not spending time with them anymore. You can take one of several approaches to accomplish this. These approaches can be:
- Ruthless: You can cut people out ruthlessly by telling them you don’t want to hang out anymore. You will likely come across as mean and rude.
- Honest: In this approach, you can be honest by telling your friends that you are in the process of cutting yourself off from society. Expect resistance from people who care about you.
- Avoiding: You can just stop talking to the people in your life. Avoid their calls, avoid making eye contact if they’re talking to you.
- Passive: Decline invitations and let your friends get tired of asking you to hang out.
- It’s healthy for you to cut negative people from your life. These people can restrict your growth and stability.^{[11]
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  Research source}Establish boundaries for your own well-being by refusing to have these people in your life.
3
Explain your motivations to your loved ones. It is up to you whether or not to tell the people in your life that you intend to cut yourself off from them. But if you’re in a relationship, your partner may be hurt, angry, or confused by your decision. In most cases, you owe it to your partner to explain why you’re isolating yourself.
- Be compassionate with your loved ones. It can be devastating for parents to have a child cut himself off from them. They may undergo the same sorts of feelings associated with the death of a child.^{[12]
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4
Don’t leave your responsibilities. If you have responsibilities such as caring for children, it’s not recommended that you cut yourself off from society. You need to provide good, stable, healthy care for your children.
- If you have children that you care for, this is probably not a good time to cut yourself off from society.

Part 5

Part 5 of 7:

Tying Up Loose Ends

1
Pay off your debts. If you don’t want to have contact with the outside world, you’ll need to eliminate the reasons why people might want to contact you. Paying off your debts is important, so that you won’t be harassed for not paying your bills.
2
Determine if you want to receive mail. It may be important to continue receiving mail, in order to receive important notices or other unexpected communications. You might also choose to receive supplies through the mail.
- If you’re living off the grid, get a post office box in a nearby town. You can check this periodically without needing to talk with anyone.
3
Have an emergency contact. It’s a good idea to have at least one person as an emergency contact. This person might periodically check up on you. They might also be someone you feel comfortable contacting if you need help.
- Make sure to ask this person if they want to be your emergency contact.

Part 6

Part 6 of 7:

Going Off the Grid

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Find a location with adequate resources. When you go off the grid, you are removing yourself from mainstream society. You will be fending for yourself, gathering food and water and providing your own shelter. You won’t have access to public utilities and other services that you get living in a regular community. Find a place that can offer you enough resources, including food supply, water supply, and shelter.
- You may be able to adapt a cabin for your own purposes, or you might want to build yourself a new house or cabin.
- You might choose a location that is a couple of hours’ drive from the nearest gas station or grocery store. There may be no hospital within many miles. If this is the case, you might not have access to medical services.
2
Get your energy sources squared away. You no longer have electricity from the local power company, so if you want electricity, you will need to find a way to produce your own. Solar and water power will allow you to use lights, refrigerator, washing machine, music player, and other machines.
- Look into purchasing additional solar panels as you can afford them. While you might adjust to life with less electricity, there are certain conveniences that you will probably want.
- Get rechargeable batteries. Make sure they are never less than 50% charged to ensure that you will always have enough power.^{[13]
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3
Have access to a filtered water supply. If you do not have access to town water, you may need to sink a well in order to meet your water needs. If you choose to build your own well, you might need a permit, depending on your state. Be sure to stay at least 50 feet (15.2 m) away from any septic tank, marshy areas and any other areas with potential contamination.^{[14]
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- Use a water-testing kit. This kit will help you determine whether your water has safe or unsafe levels of certain chemicals in it. These kits are readily available online or at home improvement stores. Some counties offer free water testing as well.
- Be sure to filter your water to avoid sickness. For example, if your water is high in lime, you may get a stomach ache if you drink it unfiltered.
4
Have medical supplies handy. If your location is so remote that the nearest hospital is more than an hour or two away, you should consider becoming knowledgeable of simple medical procedures.
- Assemble a medical kit with supplies such as bandages, antibiotics, penicillin, thread and needle for doing stitches, and other supplies.
5
Start a garden. While you might have food occasionally delivered to your off-grid location, you also need to provide food for yourself. Plant a large garden with a variety of vegetables.
- Learn what plants can grow in different seasons so that you constantly have fresh food growing in your garden.
- Store vegetables over the winter. Potatoes, onions, carrots and other root vegetables are especially well-suited to long-term storage in a cool place.
6
Get a few livestock animals. If you have cows or goats of both sexes, you can be provided with meat and milk, depending on the breed. Chickens and ducks can provide meat and eggs.
7
Figure out if you need to generate income. If you have a lot of savings, you might be able to go off the grid without needing to continue working. But if you don’t have substantial savings, you will probably still need to generate income in some way. Think about sources for income, including selling vegetables or artisan craft items at a nearby farmer’s market.
- If you’re off the grid, your internet access may be limited or nonexistent. This might make telecommuting a difficult proposition.

Part 7

Part 7 of 7:

Handling Being Alone

1
Express lonely feelings. If you are starting to feel lonely after cutting yourself off, don’t bottle up those feelings. Express them through creative outlets, such as journaling, painting, dancing or singing.
2
Get a pet. Research shows that pets can improve your mood and your overall health. A person with a pet will likely have lower blood pressure and lower indicators of heart disease, such as triglyceride and cholesterol levels.^{[15]
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Trustworthy Source
HelpGuide
Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources.
Go to source} Having a companion such as a cat or dog can ease loneliness as well.
3
Take up a hobby. Keep your mind busy with a stimulating activity. Hobbies keep you moving forward. They can also help you with focus and concentration. Find a hobby that you like, such as knitting, playing music, gardening or woodworking.^{[16]
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Participate in a solo sport. Just because you’ve cut yourself off from society doesn’t mean you have to spend your time holed up in your house. Get outside and get some exercise by participating in a solo sport, like cycling, hiking, running, or yoga.
5
Go on adventures. Now that you have cut yourself off from your friends and family, you can do exactly what you want. Go hiking, take a cross-country bike ride, or go canoeing. You can enjoy your solitude with a great adventure.^{[17]
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Warnings

Although you’ve cut yourself off from society, it’s important to keep up with your personal health and hygiene. Even when you don’t see or talk to anybody, you need to take care of your health. If you have any medical issues, get professional medical attention right away.

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