This article was co-authored by Sandra Possing. Sandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles.
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You only get one life, so it's important not to waste it. Each day should be enjoyable and leave you feeling positive about the next. But how? With the right mindset, an attitude of gratitude, and a little paying forward (just to name a few of the below hints), you'll be looking forward to each day, no question.
Steps
Opening Your Mind to Enjoyment
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1Remember that this day only happens once. Though it's a pretty basic idea, actually realizing it can help remind you to make the most of this day, and to be as positive as possible. How good is today going to be? How will you remember it? Will it be another tally under the "Good Days" column?
- It also helps you separate out the days, eliminating stress that carries over from one day to the next. When today is the only day you're dealing with and it's never going to occur again, it helps you live like each day is a separate life.[1]
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2Stop waiting. Many people live in a land of "ifs" when it comes to their happiness. "I could just relax if I got a raise," or, "If I lost a bit of weight, I could be happy with myself." But the thing is, most of the time these things don't happen and things that don't happen should have no effect on our happiness. If you stop waiting, you'll find that each day becomes more enjoyable.
- Of course, that's not to say you shouldn't go after the things you want and become a bystander in your own life.Go after them, seize them, make them happen, just don't wait for them to come around to you.
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3Cultivate an attitude of gratitude. For those of us who have forgotten how to enjoy life, it's usually partly because we take for granted what we have. It's in front of us every day, so we begin to concentrate on the things we don't have. Unfortunately, this isn't very healthy and can lead to anxiety, stress, and depression. Instead, think of what you do have. Whether it's a nice car in the garage or a family at the dinner table, it all has value.[2]
- If this strikes a chord with you, make a list. Write down everything you're grateful for, and don't forget basic things like your health. When you're feeling down (or even just part of a daily routine), break out the list for an instant pick-me-up.
- Taking pride in your life and in the things you do makes it easier to be grateful. Sure, you may be punching numbers, but you keep the wheels turning at your job. Maybe you don't have the nicest car, but you put food on the table for your family, and it's a pretty great family, too.
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4Celebrate your successes. Too often we write off the things we do and focus on the things others are doing. That's a surefire way to be on the browner side of the fence and to have each day slip by unhappily. Make it a point to pat yourself on the back every time you do something great. You have value and skill, along with the ability to make every day pretty wonderful.
- It doesn't have to be anything big. If you met a deadline at work, be happy about it. Did you actually manage to go for that run? Excellent, look at you staying motivated! Make it a point to see that the little things you're capable are noteworthy and help focus today on the positive.
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5See the value in life's simple pleasures. As the gap between the rich and the poor widens, it's too easy to develop a frame of mind for material successes and not for simple peace of mind. We see the CEOs raking in the millions and are envious. In reality, those CEOs aren't enjoying those days any more than the rest of us. Why? Because plenty of life's simple pleasures are what it's about, like cuddling with your kids or a pet, a cup of hot cocoa on a rainy day, or mealtime with family or friends. These little things that seem like nothing? They're actually just about everything.
- So the next time you're watching TV and curled up in a blanket, playing with your cat, or just hanging out with your friends, take a moment to realize that this moment is pretty darn good, and that it's moment like these that make life worth living.
Taking Care of You
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1Laugh, and laugh at yourself. We've all met people that just aren't fun. They're not easily impressed, they put a negative spin on everything, and they just don't laugh. What's the point in living then? If you don't take anything too seriously, all of life lightens up and becomes more enjoyable. Try to find something every day to laugh at, like you're a four-year-old who can laugh at pink soap. Pink soap!
- And more importantly, laugh at yourself. When you do something silly or stupid, laugh. You'd laugh at your friends, right? If nothing is a big deal, you won't stress about it. It'll be smooth, enjoyable living from the day you decide to not take everything so seriously. After all, what's the point in worrying?
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2Don't sweat the small stuff. You know the phrase, "There's no use crying over spilled milk?" It's a little cliché, sure, but it still gets at the truth: the little things in life that are seemingly out of our control aren't worth getting upset about and giving power. The traffic? Nope. The line at the counter? Nope. The spilled milk? Definitely not. Life is full of mostly small stuff, and letting them get to us keeps us from enjoying life. In short, it's just not worth it.
- How do you do this, though? Well, it starts with Step 1 above. The more you realize that time is precious and it's just your one life you're living, it all becomes the best story you'll ever be a part of. And the bad stuff? That just happens. It makes your story interesting.
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3Take good care of your body. Have you ever been just fine one day, and then the next you're super sick or you've broken your leg, or something went physically wrong? You didn't realize how easy life was until this unfortunate thing happened. Health is so important, and we don't realize how easy and enjoyable it makes life. So whether or not you have yours, take good care of yourself. Your body and mind will appreciate it.
- The two not-so-surprising things you can do? Eat right and keep moving. You don't stop moving because you get old, you get old because you stop moving. And to keep yourself moving, fill your body with foods that make it feel good, like fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and lean meats. When your body feels good, it's easier for your mind to follow suit.
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4Make time to relax. Humans are living in a time like any other. A time where we worry about money, clothes, the Jones', and things we never even dreamed of worrying about before. The way we're living now isn't necessarily natural, and it's definitely not necessarily for the best. Because of this, we all need to take time to just live simply and relax. In fact, it should be a priority. If you don't have time for, make time. Your health and happiness depend on it.
- Even just 20 minutes or so a day of "me time" can get you back to firing on all cylinders. Whether it's meditation, napping, or watching TV, it's fine so long as you enjoy it and it recharges you.
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5Resolve to take small, baby steps on your path to life enjoyment. Completely overhauling the way you think at the press of a button isn't likely going to happen. You can read all the positive, life-affirming stuff out there, but that won't force a switch to flip in your head. Instead, resolve to be 1% better tomorrow. In just one instance today, you're going to laugh, or not sweat it, or be grateful. Tomorrow, you'll do it 1% more. You don't have to be perfect right now; you just have to be on the right path.[3]
- You'll likely find that you want to go faster than just one moment per day. Those 5 minutes you spent being grateful or laughing at yourself will be a taste of what's to come, and you'll want more. Taking it slowly is good motivation to keep going.
Making Changes and Taking Action
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1Do something you love. You've heard it in many forms: follow your passions, find your dreams, do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life. And while that's partly true, what's more true is that part of your day should be devoted to something that makes you feel good. It may not be your passion or your dream, but you love it. It'll fill your life with purpose, and a life with purpose is much easier to enjoy than a life without one.[4]
- For many of us, doing what we love for a living isn't an option, at least right now. And that's fine you don't have to do what you love from 9 to 5 every weekday. Fit it in where you can, and it'll keep you going. In fact, you'll want to keep going. Doing what you love will provide you with drive and ambition, and get you looking forward to each and every new day.
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2Make friends with your coworkers. The fact of the matter is that life is just easier when you get along with those around you. You don't have to have them over for dinner every night, but be friendly. You'll never know who can help you out and make your life better or who you can help out, too.
- This isn't only about your coworkers, either. Make friends with your neighbors, your in-laws, whoever is in your circle that could be a little closer. Friends at work makes work more enjoyable, being friendly with your neighbors makes being at home more enjoyable, and having a large social network will help you feel loved and secure.
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3Find something beautiful to appreciate every day. It's easy to spend your days in a cubicle and your nights in front of a TV. Days like that, it's pretty hard to remember how beautiful the world is. Take a moment to find a piece of beauty in your life and acknowledge it. Let it sink in. Isn't this world pretty amazing?[5]
- It could be anything from your significant other to a rose you passed on the street. It could even be an exchange of a person helping out another person. What strikes you as beautiful? What about yourself and your beauty?
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4Fill your life with positive people. Life is too short to be surrounded by negativity, especially if we're looking at each day as a separate life (then life is far, far too short). Because of this, don't waste your time with negative people in your world. Surround yourself with people that make you feel good and give you inspiration to be better and happier. What's the reward in doing otherwise?
- Ending a toxic friendship isn't fun, but it must be done. You can slowly start seeing this person or these people less and less, and hopefully they'll get the hint. If they don't, you may need to say something like, "I'm working on being more positive and enjoying each day, and sometimes you keep me from being able to do that." Who knows? Maybe you'll inspire them to become better themselves.
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5Show affection to those you care about. The old adage "It is better to give than to receive" is true partly because it fills us with that warm, fuzzy feeling that we've just helped someone out and done a good deed. And the same goes with affection; if you are doling out the love to those around you, you're going to feel pretty dang good about yourself and about your days. What's more, the love will likely come back in return, making your days even better.
- The next time you see someone you care about, say hello with a surprise hug. Make it last about 7 seconds, and both of your brains will start releasing endorphins, those little happy-maker chemicals in our brains cuing us to feel good.[6]
- It doesn't have to be those you're close or intimate with, either. Simply asking a coworker how his day was and actually waiting for a legitimate answer can show you care, too. Take these small opportunities to spread the love and pay it forward, making the most out of every day.
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QuestionHow can I make every day special?Sandra PossingSandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles.
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QuestionWhat brings the most happiness in life?Sandra PossingSandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles.
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Warnings
- Don't ever try to crack jokes on your boss in a very important meeting it can get really messy.⧼thumbs_response⧽
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/202001/living-life-the-fullest
- ↑ Sandra Possing. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 15 July 2020.
- ↑ https://learningcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/changing-habits/
- ↑ Sandra Possing. Life Coach. Expert Interview. 15 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.wellbeingguide.ca/wp-content/site/files/res-21ways.pdf
- ↑ https://www.udel.edu/academics/colleges/canr/cooperative-extension/fact-sheets/building-strong-family-relationships/