How to Make Your Girlfriend Jealous

Co-authored by John Keegan

Last Updated: November 7, 2022

Jealousy is a powerful emotion that can turn a great relationship toxic. However, it can also be used as a funny prank or a quick way to rekindle the flames of desire. Do you feel that your girlfriend is not giving you the attention you deserve? Applied judiciously, just a hint of jealousy can make your girlfriend realize what that two of you have together. However, jealousy should be avoided and never used maliciously as it easily opens old wounds or breeds new paranoia. Understanding where you stand with your girlfriend and caring for her self-confidence is key to managing jealousy.

Part 1

Part 1 of 4:

Understanding Jealousy

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Know that jealousy masks deeper emotions. Jealousy is natural and often something that we cannot control. If you choose to make your girlfriend jealous, understand that you may unearth some feelings that she is not ready to deal with like insecurity or shame.^{[1]
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Evaluate your girlfriend’s self-confidence. Jealousy stems from being self-critical. Be careful how you choose to make your girlfriend jealous because she might already have an unhealthy perception of herself.^{[2]
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Find out about your girlfriend’s past. Your girlfriend may have experienced damaging relationships in the past but be too ashamed to tell anyone or she might have consciously moved past it; however, subconsciously, she still may suffer from its negative effects. Shame can influence how jealous and insecure your girlfriend will become so avoid exploiting her innermost sensitivities.^{[3]
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- Do not open old wounds. If she has shared something intimate with you, you will damage your relationship by using it against her.

Part 2

Part 2 of 4:

Identifying Her Insecurities

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Pay attention to her. Whether you’re trying to make her jealous to reignite your relationship or as a playful prank, learn what will trigger her jealousy. The attention you pay her will not only allow you to learn how to make her jealous but it will also create a bond. Consequently, be aware that the stronger your bond the more toxic jealousy can become.^{[4]
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- Some people are more sensitive than others so be aware of what triggers will push her too far. For example, some girls may find playful flirting with strangers amusing while others may find it very disrespectful and will end a relationship over it. Tread lightly.
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Establish boundaries. Don’t go too far with this charade. Ask yourself what you’re hoping to achieve by making your girlfriend jealous. Evaluate what your relationship means to you and proceed with caution if you think that jealousy is the best course of action.
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Avoid things that can legitimately be considered threatening. Relationships can be fragile if you introduce elements that can easily play on your girlfriend’s psyche. No matter how open-minded she says she is, it’s easy to play up her paranoia with logic. For example, keeping a relationship with an ex may easily bring about jealousy.
- If she says that she does not want you to interact with someone, do not use this against her. Her paranoia is already at high alert so breaking your promise will do irreversible damage.
- Avoid using an ex to make her jealous. Knowing that you already have had a romantic relationship makes it easy to believe you can rekindle it at any moment.
- Do not mention high profile friends. Whether you have mutual friends that are on tv, play professional sports, or have high paying jobs, their social status makes them an alluring romantic pursuit. Your girlfriend may easily become jealous if you show too much favor to a high profile friend.

Part 3

Part 3 of 4:

Using your Social Circle

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Make plans on your own. Make plans to watch sports or hit the bar with your buddies. Make your girlfriend jealous by showing her that you have a healthy social life.^{[5]
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- Don’t make her feel like a burden or that she isn’t fun to be around. This is just meant to show her that you are fun to be around.
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Utilize social media. Like a photo or leave fun comments to friends that you know she will see. Social media can be open to interpretation. Your girlfriend may easily become jealous if your social media is littered with Likes towards other women. It can also be filled with inside jokes or photos of experiences that she was not there for.^{[6]
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Immerse yourself at work. Your job can be an easy source of jealousy because you probably can spend a lot of time at work and justify it as ambition. Be careful if she becomes jealous of your relationship with a coworker because her paranoia may end up costing you your job if she begins asking other coworkers about the two of you. Worse yet, your girlfriend may reach out to your coworker's husband or boyfriend and you could ruin your coworker's relationship unintentionally.
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Become friendly with your girlfriend's female friends. Whether you increase your social media interactions or invite them out to activities, your girlfriend may become jealous if your interest in her friends suddenly increases. This is especially effective if the friend you choose is single or has complimented you in the past.
- Be careful if you get too close to her best friend as it may cause deep emotional damage.
- Learn the dynamics she has with her friends so as not to open up deeper issues. One of her friends may have a history of stealing men.

Part 4

Part 4 of 4:

Focusing on Other Women

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Compliment other women. Compliment celebrities on tv or strangers within your line of sight. Your girlfriend may become jealous because she may automatically compare herself to that person. Celebrities are an especially easy target as the media is obsessed with body image and managing persona.^{[7]
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Speak to women in front of her. While it is perfectly acceptable to interact with any gender, your girlfriend may become jealous if your interactions play on her insecurities. Only you will know what is appropriate and what will make her jealous. Some women don’t mind if playfully touching and joking with a waitress while your girlfriend may become jealous if you smile at your server the wrong way.^{[8]
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Bring a third wheel. Invite a mutual female friend with you to an activity that normally only you and your girlfriend do together. Be cautious not to make this an obvious wedge but rather a harmless afterthought. Say something like, “I invited Julia hiking tomorrow. She said she hasn’t been to Eagle’s Canyon so I told her we’d pick her up if she wanted to join us.” This shows that you have been paying attention to other women without being immature or obvious.^{[9]
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Warnings

Don't overdo it. If you love her then don't be too mean.

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She may end your relationship.

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She may want to exact revenge and make you jealous too.

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