How to Pack for Transgender Men

Co-authored by Shahpar Mirza and Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA

Last Updated: March 26, 2023 Approved

Packing can give you a realistic bulge in your pants when you’re presenting as male. You can choose to do either a soft pack or a hard pack, depending on your goals and preferences. A soft pack creates a flaccid bulge in your pants, which is a great everyday option. On the other hand, a hard pack creates the look of an erection, which might work great for a date night. It’s helpful to practice both types of packing at home before taking your bulge in public.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Creating a Soft Pack

1
Use rolled up socks for an easy option. It’s best to wear tight briefs or boxer briefs when using rolled up socks to help keep them in place. Position the socks to create the bulge you want, then safety pin them in place, for best results.^{[1]
X
Research source}
- You can play around with size by choosing different sized socks. For example, crew socks are bigger than ankle socks, so they'll likely create a bigger bulge.
Tip: Using safety pins is optional, but it helps prevent the socks from shifting or moving down your leg.
2
Wear a soft packer device inside tight underwear or a jockstrap. A soft packer device looks and feels like a flaccid penis, so it gives you a very realistic bulge. A soft packer also allows you to look down and see a penis in your underwear. You can find soft packers in different sizes and skin tones so it’s easy to find one that works well for you.^{[2]
X
Research source}
- If you wear a jockstrap, you can wear regular boxers without worrying your packer will move out of place.
EXPERT TIP

Shahpar Mirza
Community Transgender Expert
Shahpar Mirza is a Community Transgender Expert who began his transition from female-to-male (FTM) starting in 2016. He has had hormone replacement therapy since 2017 and underwent a double mastectomy (top surgery) in April 2018. Through experiences such as working for the Queer Student Resources Center at Stanford University, he is passionate about spreading more awareness about the transgender community and clarifying common misconceptions people may have. He received his BS in Product Design from Stanford University in 2019.

Shahpar Mirza
Community Transgender Expert

Expert Trick: If you're a transgender guy and you want to pack, consider using packer pouches that you can safely pin to your underwear. That will help keep the packer in place so it won't fall out of your pants or shorts. Also, boxer briefs will hold your packer in place more securely than just boxers.
3
Consider using a stand to pee (STP) packer to pee standing up. These packer devices resemble a penis but have a cup on one end so that you can urinate through them. This allows you to use a urinal or stand up in a bathroom stall while you’re peeing, if that’s important to you.^{[3]
X
Research source}
- You can also use other STP devices to pee standing up if you don’t want to invest in a packer that allows this or just prefer a different type of packer.
- It’s perfectly normal to not want to stand while you pee, so don’t feel like you have to use one of these devices if you don’t feel that it’s right for you. You are still welcome to use the men's or boys' bathroom.
4
Use a swimmer's jockstrap if you want to pack under swimwear. A swimmer’s jockstrap is made for use under a swimsuit or wetsuit. You can use this type of jockstrap to pack while you’re at the beach or pool. The swimmer’s jockstrap will hold your pack in place under your swimsuit.
- If you're going swimming, it's most convenient to wear a packer device, which won't soak up any water. Alternatively, you might try putting your socks in a plastic zip-up bag.
5
Check out your profile in the mirror to make sure you like your look. Make adjustments as needed to create the right bulge for you. Remember to look at yourself from different angles. Additionally, move back and forth to see how the bulge moves.^{[4]
X
Research source}
- It may take a few tries to get the bulge you want.
6
Practice sitting, walking, and standing so your bulge feels comfortable. It’s common for your packer to feel uncomfortable or different when you first start wearing it. If it’s important to you to pack, give yourself time to get used to it. Start by wearing your packer for a short period of time, then gradually lengthen how long you wear it.^{[5]
X
Research source}
- It’s helpful to wear it around your home at first so that you can get used to what it feels like and how it moves before you’re in public.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Doing a Hard Pack

1
Choose a dildo that feels right to you. It’s best to choose one that’s close to the average penis size, which is about 4.7 to 6.3 inches (12 to 16 cm).^{[6]
X
Research source} Getting a dildo that’s too big will be very uncomfortable for you, and may cause bruising. After you know the size you want, choose the color you prefer, which will likely be the closest to your skin tone.^{[7]
X
Research source}
- Additionally, you can find dildos that have a foreskin, if that’s what you prefer.
Tip: If you’re using your dildo with a partner, you may want to ask them what size dildo they prefer.
2
Put your dildo in a harness that you will wear. The harness will keep the dildo in place, plus it will allow you to easily use the dildo for sex. Once you have the harness on, tighten or loosen the straps as necessary to get a fit that’s comfortable to you.^{[8]
X
Research source}
- If you buy a dildo made for packing, it may come with a harness. As another alternative, you can look for a bundle containing both a dildo and a harness.
3
Wear your briefs or boxers over the harness and dildo. You can wear any type of underwear you like. Additionally, you can wear your normal clothes over your harness and dildo. However, keep in mind that people may see your dildo under your clothes.^{[9]
X
Research source}
- If you’re having a date night at home, you might enjoy showing off your erection through your pants.
- If you want to wear your dildo in public, try different positions for hiding your dildo to figure out which one is more comfortable for you. For example, your dildo may be less visible if you push it back between your legs or position it so it’s down against your thigh.
4
Consider purchasing a pack-and-play device for easier sex-play. These types of packers are really convenient for date nights. They allow you to easily go from flaccid bulge to erection so that you can have sex after a night out without changing your device. Each model is different, so read the product description to help you choose a device that does what you want.^{[10]
X
Research source}
- Some pack-and-play devices go from flaccid to hard if you tuck the dildo part of it between your legs when you’re not using it.^{[11]
  X
  Research source}

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Caring for Your Packer

1
Adjust your packer if it starts to feel uncomfortable. It’s normal for your packer to move around in your underwear, and sometimes that can lead to a painful situation! Don’t be afraid to reposition your packer while you’re out and about. Just as biological guys adjust their penises, you can adjust your own bulge.

Tip: When you need to adjust, don’t feel like you need to explain what you’re doing to anyone.
2
Wash your packer after each use. While you can throw a pair of socks into the wash, caring for a packer device can be trickier. Follow the cleaning instructions for your particular model, as they can vary.
- Not washing your device can make it become smelly and may result in an infection.^{[12]
  X
  Research source}
- Always read the cleaning instructions on your packer to make sure you know how to clean it properly, as well as any products to avoid. Cleaning it with the wrong supplies can damage it over time.^{[13]
  X
  Research source}
3
Store your packer on a shelf or in a box that offers protection. Unfortunately, packers can easily get damaged. You don’t want your packer to get bent, dented, or misshapen, so don’t stuff it in a drawer or throw it on the bottom of your closet. Instead, place it somewhere it has space, such as out on your dresser or in a storage box.^{[14]
X
Research source}

Community Q&A

Question

What can I use to make it look like I have a penis without buying any special supplies?

Community Answer

A rolled up sock should be just fine. Just make sure you wear tight underwear to compress it and/or secure it with a pin.
Question

I look 95% male, but no one accepts me. What should I do?

Community Answer

Make sure you accept yourself. This is very important when living as an out trans person. Then, try to ditch the people who don't accept you and surround yourself with people who do. If that isn't currently possible where you live, try finding online friends who accept you. Just be safe and remember that you are never alone
Question

My partner thinks I am a male. How do I make sure that it looks real enough to pass?

Community Answer

It's better to tell them the truth -- you'll have to eventually anyway. If they don't understand, they probably aren't the right person for you.

Warnings

Your packer may show up on airport security screeners, so it’s helpful to have a note from your psychologist explaining that the packer is part of your identity. If this makes you uncomfortable, putting your packer in your suitcase while you’re going through security may be the best option.

⧼thumbs_response⧽
Helpful 42 Not Helpful 0
Packing too tightly or hard packing with a dildo that's too large may cause bruising.

⧼thumbs_response⧽
Helpful 30 Not Helpful 1