How to Persuade a Girl over Text

Co-authored by Cher Gopman and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: June 12, 2022 References

Texting the girl you like is a great way to get to know her more and exchange a few flirty messages. Convincing her to like you back might take a little while, but by taking things slow and having a fun conversation, you can show your crush just how awesome of a person you are. We’ve compiled some texting tips that you can use to persuade your crush to like you back in no time!

1

Keep the conversation light and positive.

Your goal is to be playful and flirty, not heavy! When you’re texting a girl that you like, talk about superficial stuff, like school, work, and your hobbies. Keep the conversations fun and lighthearted so the person is interested to continue the conversation. Save the deeper conversations for when you’re together in person so that you have something to talk about IRL.^{[1]
X
Research source}
- It’s pretty hard to get your tone across over a text message, which is another reason why you might want to save the heavier topics for a later time.
- Try talking about things like your pets, your friends, and what you like to do for fun.

2

Get the conversation rolling with open-ended questions.

These can also help keep you the conversation flowing. Open-ended questions can’t be answered with a yes or a no, she'll have to reply with a full sentence. As you two chat, be sure to keep a few open-ended questions in your back pocket, and try to avoid asking anything that the girl can reply to with one word. Some basic open-ended questions include:^{[2]
X
Research source}
- “How’s your day going?”
- “How was work today?”
- “How was the weather at the beach?”

3

Ask her questions about herself.

Get to know her while making her feel special. Chat about her friends, her family, her schoolwork, or her job to learn more about what she does on the daily. Feel free to chime in with some of your own info, so she can get to know you, too! Try questions like:^{[3]
X
Research source}
- “What do you like to do on the weekends?”
- “How many siblings do you have?”
- “How long have you been at your job?”
- “What are you studying in school?”

4

Bring up her interests.

This shows that you remember stuff she’s talked about before. Plus, it’s a great way to keep a conversation going. She’ll be excited to chat about something she loves, especially with a cool person like you! Go for something like:^{[4]
X
Research source}
- “Did you watch Riverdale last night? That episode was crazy!!”
- “How was skiing last weekend? Did you try any blue runs?”
- “I heard your favorite band was coming to town! Did you get tickets for the show yet?”

5

Give her a few compliments.

Flatter her by telling her something you like about her. You can talk about her personality, her bright smile, or even her sense of humor. Giving her a couple of compliments will let her know that you might like her a little more than as just a friend, and it will probably make her smile, too! Say something like:^{[5]
X
Research source}
- “You have such a good sense of humor.”
- “Your smile is so beautiful.”
- “You’re such a kind person! I’m so lucky to know you.”

6

Send her a few memes to make her giggle.

Show off your sense of humor to get her to like you even more. You can scroll through your own personal meme archive, or you can search for ones on Instagram or Twitter. Find a funny one that you know she’ll laugh at, then send it along with a message like, “This made me think of you!”^{[6]
X
Research source}
- If you aren’t quite sure what her humor is like yet, just send a meme that you think is funny.

7

Create an inside joke together.

If you’ve known her for a little while, try this out. Creating an inside joke gives you two a special connection, and it’s one she won’t share with anyone else. Maybe you made a silly typo over text a while ago, and you two couldn’t stop giggling about it. Or maybe you shared a funny video of a guy tripping in the street, and it made you both laugh really hard. Text her something like:^{[7]
X
Research source}
- “About to go on a run. Hope I don’t run into a pole like that guy in the vid!”
- “Hope you ace (not ice!!!) the test today!”

8

Throw in some flirty emojis.

The right emoji can set the romantic tone for your message. You don’t have to add an emoji to every text you send, but try putting one in every couple of messages to keep lighthearted and fun. Emojis like ❤️, 😘, and 🤗 show that you might like her (in a romantic way).^{[8]
X
Research source}
- For instance, you could say something like, “How are you today? ❤️”
- Or, “Can’t wait to see you later😘”

9

Test the waters with a sweet message.

Start making her think about you in a more romantic way. Once you two have chatted for a little while, you can start sending her messages about how much you like her and how much you’ve enjoyed chatting with her. Try messages like:^{[9]
X
Research source}
- “Nobody’s perfect, but you’re so close that it’s scary.”
- “The only time I stupidly smile at my phone is when you text me.”
- “I always wake up smiling nowadays, and I think it’s your fault.”

10

Avoid texting her multiple times in a row.

Sometimes a girl might not respond to you, and that’s okay. You can get away with texting her 2 times in a row, but after that, it’s best to give her some space. You never know why someone isn’t texting you back, and chances are, it has nothing to do with you! She’s probably just busy, and she’ll most likely respond to your message when she finds the time again.^{[10]
X
Research source}

11

Ask her to meet up in person.

If you two are really clicking, try asking her out on a casual date. Keep things light, and try going for a casual vibe. If she’s interested in you, you two can start planning your date, and you can settle on a place and time to meet up and chat in person. Text her something like:^{[11]
X
Research source}
- “Have any plans this weekend? I was thinking of checking out that new coffee shop if you wanted to join me.”
- “I’m going to be in your area next week, are you free to meet up at all?”
- Some girls get a little shy about meeting up in person, especially if you two don’t know each other IRL yet. If that’s the case, just give her some time, and keep having a text convo with her until she’s ready.

12

Try to take rejection in stride.

She might not be interested in you, and that’s okay! If you ask her to hang out and she doesn’t seem interested, set your sights on someone else, and remember that there are plenty of other fish in the sea. When two people don’t end up together, it just means they weren’t right for each other.^{[12]
X
Research source}
- Everyone faces rejection at some point in their life. All you can do is look toward the future!