The Cheesiest Lines to Get a Nurse to Notice You

They’ll be checking their own heart rate after hearing these flirty pickup lines

Co-authored by Aly Rusciano

Last Updated: February 20, 2023

Funny Pick Up Lines

|

Sweet Pick Up Lines

|

Bold Pick Up Lines

|

Tips

So, there’s this awesome nurse who’s captured your attention. They’re kind, smart, and absolutely gorgeous. What can you say to get their number? Well, you’ve come to the right place because we’ve got the best nurse pickup lines you can use to say, “Hey, I like you.” From funny puns to bold statements, we’ve got something for every nurse specialty. Simply take a deep breath, smile, and give it your best shot—you got this!

Section 1 of 3:

Funny Pick Up Lines

1
Are you an appendix? Because being around you makes me want to burst.
2
Do you have a stethoscope? Because my heart just skipped a beat.

Advertisement
3
Are you Broca’s Aphasia? Because you leave me speechless.
4
I think I might need some Vitamin U!
5
You must be the cure for Alzheimer’s because you’re unforgettable.
6
Do you have an inhaler? Because you just took my breath away.
7
My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.
8
Are you a pulmonary embolism? Because you make me breathless.
9
Do you have a Band-Aid? I scraped my knee falling for you.
10
Are you a defibrillator? Because you’re sending shocks right to my heart.
11
I may have astigmatism, but I see clearly when I’m with you.
12
You better call Life Alert because I’ve fallen for you and can’t get up.
13
Are you an optic chiasm? Because you’ve turned my world around.
14
You get my heart racing like an epinephrine drip.
15
Do you have an extra lung? Because I’ve been LUNG-ing for you.
16
My love for you burns stronger than a urinary tract infection.

Section 2 of 3:

Sweet Pick Up Lines

1
I’m not an organ donor, but I’d give you my heart.
2
If you keep being this sweet, you might give me diabetes.
3
Blood is red. Cyanosis is blue. I get tachycardia when I’m with you.
4
I don’t want an apple a day because I don’t want you to go away.
5
Did you hear that? Even my heart murmurs, “I love you!”
6
You make my dopamine levels soar.
7
Is there something in your eye? Nope. Just a sparkle.
8
I don’t want to get better because that would mean I’d never see you again.

Section 3 of 3:

Bold Pick Up Lines

1
I think my vestibulocochlear nerve is damaged. I keep falling for you.
2
I think you’re suffering from a lack of Vitamin Me.
3
Am I drowning? Because I would love some mouth-to-mouth.
4
Do I have to get critically injured to see you again, or can I have your number?
5
Is it my olfactory, or do you smell really good?
6
I hope you know CPR because you take my breath away.
7
I think I have a tic because I can’t stop winking at you.
8
Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.
9
You should diagnose me to see if I’m a good partner.
10
We should study anatomy together sometime.
11
I think you should take your temperature instead. You’re looking pretty hot.
12
You’d be amazed by how fast I can do rapid clothing removal.
13
Did we go to school together? I could swear we had chemistry.